BlogHer - caregiving - Comments

Yep! Been there...

zazupitts — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 12:24:18 -0500

Honestly, it's a balancing act where no one wins...and someone always loses out. Take a typical morning in caregiverland: Take husband to work. Walk niece to her elementary class. Give mom her meds, breakfast and put her back in bed for a morning nap. Conference call with co-worker on the East Coast (done while I comb my niece's hair).

To be honest, having a career that allows me flextime at home in the mornings is the only way I have survived! I wonder if there are any other caregivers and Sandwhich Generation folks who have changed careers to accomodate these time demands?

Living in Caregiverland

www.Caregiverland.com

I'm skipping the farmers market today

Denise — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 07:16:47 -0500

I have a ton of work to do. I pulled down my blog last week because it was bugging me, and now it's bugging me because it's not there. TW ran over my foot with the wheelchair twice yesterday, with her mother in it. I think I'm too tired, too stressed and too busy for the Farmers Market/Breakfast/Assisted Living visit today even though we are also running out of summer and I'll be longing for Farmers Market Sundays for months on end.

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Gary

Thankless Job — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 20:42:01 -0500

Hah!

Thanks! I really appreciate your support!

Gary himself nixed the laptop idea. He's our in-house tech support and he says he just can't spare the kind of time it would take to teach Maw even the very basics of computer use.

But I promised to invite Maw's sister (and family) up here for Thanksgiving. She seems satisfied with that for now.

Thankless

No he's not

Denise — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 13:41:04 -0500

I'm reading!

I don't have a single answer for the loneliness, not one single answer. But maybe setting her up with a Facebook account would help. It couldn't hurt... could it?

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

lol Sure it doesn't

Denise — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 14:29:54 -0500

Let's increase your fiber and see what happens? And weren't you worried about my excessively high fiber intake the day I ate all of that dried fruit? hahaha

It may not CAUSE diarrhea but it should move things along - and I do not need things moved along.

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Making a note...

Denise — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 14:28:39 -0500

No tea at SCanon's in-law's house. Check.

That's the thing that gets me about Tw's mom & the fiber - she is definitely in pain but with all of that fiber, who could that HAPPEN?

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

Wait

TW — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 14:25:00 -0500

Fiber doesn't cause diarrhea. It just gives your gut more to work with..geez. Here is info on how Fiber can help Diarrhea

Beyond that it is a good choice for normalizing blood sugar levels and improving heart health. 25 grams of fiber a day is recommended for nearly every woman for good health. (and no Denise, even if you drank the entire pitcher of iced tea you wouldn't get enough fiber in your diet.)

Check out the Fiber-o-meter to see how close you come.

~TW

Retro-Food

A Great Laugh for the Day

SCanon — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 22:41:49 -0500

Thank you, Denise! Let me first say that I have IBS and it's totally not the constipation kind either, so I feel for TW, although mine I'm sure isn't as bad. Constipation scares me badly, too. My SIL suffers from regular bouts of it and the pain and discomfort she goes through is horrible to even watch!

The best part about all of this is what my husband's family does to tea. Let me just say this. Uptight mom and tranquilizers. I never drink tea over there.

Admit it Joy...

Denise — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 13:28:53 -0500

Next time you stop by for a visit, you aren't going near the iced tea are you?

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

You kill me Denise!

Joy Des Jardins — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 10:30:18 -0500

I think I'm with you on this one. Although I'm not inclined to pick one over the other....isn't the whole reason for taking fiber on a daily basis, that it kind of balances you out in that area? I don't know what too much fiber is either. It sounds like TW's mom is getting PLENTY of it.

My mom use to complain about constipation in her elder years too; and apparently it was quite uncomfortable. She felt very much like TW's mom does regarding constipation...and it became a fairly big issue with her. I rarely have that problem, so it was hard for me to truly commiserate with all that she felt. I just tried to make sure she was always supplied with what she needed.

One way or another Denise....you're always drinking something! ~Joy

Dementia Patient Spending Sprees: what to do????

gladlenise — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 07:22:35 -0500

My Mom was diagnosed with dementia by a neurologist about a year ago; its not advanced and she lives alone. I spend several hours each day with her by leaving work early, and that way, I've been able to monitor and assist her with daily needs. I had taken over her monthly bills for her ... she's on fixed income and we do not have much in the way of financial resources. Yesterday, Mom just went down and withdrew about half of the funds for upcoming April bills and went on a spending spree yesterday: I don't know what to do. I've been having that problem with her and trying hard to talk to her about it. I cannot afford to keep covering her on the monthly shortfalls. I don't know what to do. The shut-off notices will be coming, but I'm not going to be able to afford them. Mom does not understand that with only $600, she cannot go on spending sprees and still have enough to cover her monthly expenses. She can still cook for herself and bathe and dress herself, and she does not get lost. But she does get terribly confused and combative at times. I can't help her with her monthly expenses, when she goes down and withdraws mostly everything as soon as the monthly auto-deposit is recorded. Does anyone have any suggestions on the financial problem I have with her? I already have the POA's, etc., but they're not much good under these circumstances. Has anyone else been through this? Thanks.

My 80 year old m-i-l lives

slanoue — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 10:46:59 -0600

My 80 year old m-i-l lives with us. I work at home, so I am with her more than her son, who works outside the home and is gone most of the day. She and I get along fine, but it sure can be aggravating to live with her because of the dementia since she gets confused so easily. They both are in a bit of denial about the dementia, even though her doctor said she had it. I try not to get frustrated because she can't help being so aggravating. It makes things worse that she is very deaf and pretty blind as well. Despite all this, she is pretty independent and ambulatory. One day she will go into a home, but right now she can pretty much take care of herself, as long as we are around to help her now and then.

Thanks for the resources!

kazari — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 16:37:29 -0600

My best friend was just diagnosed with diabetes, and as far as she's concerned, the barbecue (grill in US?) is her best friend. grilled, marinated chicken breasts, or grilled, marinated fish, or grilled, marinated any-lean-protein. Plus salad. A big dinner that doesn't make you feel deprived.

Oh yeah, and the pureed white beans are a complete winner. Add a little garlic and it's lovely.

And the final standby? Curries with brown rice. Just add LOTS of veggies to the curry, and substitute stock for the coconut milk. It doesn't taste the same, but it's yummy anyway.

Most Low-Carbers...

MrsWsKitchen — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 10:33:31 -0600

I would venture to say that most low-carbers (like myself) live that way because of a health issue. I would never choose that dietary lifestyle for myself, not even for weight-loss purposes.

However, now that I HAVE to live this way (due to diabetes and PCOS), I do alright. I think the main goal is to look at your plate and arrange it thusly: half vegetables, 1/4 safe carb (think sweet potato, brown rice, or omit carb altogether and serve another veg that looks like a carb, like quinoa--fools the old folks like a charm) and 1/4 a lean protein.

My grandmother is diabetic and when she eats at my house she raves over the food--and it's always within her (and my) dietary restrictions. Example: A big green salad with sliced pear and a little crumbled bacon (1 or 2 slices on an entire salad is okay) with a vinaigrette. A piece of lean protein served with pureed white beans (regulates blood sugar for the whole meal) instead of mashed potatoes (they look the same).

Somtimes it's about fooling the brain.

Amanda
Mrs.W's Kitchen

I'm with you but

Denise — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 10:02:52 -0600

We're working with a woman who is set in her ways and small changes work better (in my experience) than really drastic ones. So, low carb versions of some foods are a compromise we're willing to make, in some areas.

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings