BlogHer - Race & Ethnicity - Comments

As I listen to Michel's

Nordette — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 13:46:12 -0600

As I listen to Michel's report, I recall the Grim Sleeper case, which I think remains unsolved. The victims are mostly minority, poor, and some are prostitutes, and the case only recently (March 2009) received some of the attention it deserved.

I'm fairly sick of seeing people blame female victims for their beatings and even murders.

Again, this post is excellent. I'm still thinking about it. Hence my return, and I'm not saying much, which is usually a sign that I'm brooding over the whole situation, mostly how people are complaining about the coverage.

Nordette Adams is a BlogHer CE & you can find her other stuff through Her 411.

And that leads to derelection of duty

Jill Miller Zimon — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 10:11:10 -0600

I'm angry at how, when that thinking gets accepted, esp. by our law enforcement folks, as well as whomever else might have had a chance to pursue stopping Sowell, other excuses get used to mask the discomfort people feel about helping people who indeed might not have been helping themselves. But their not helping themselves should NEVER be an excuse for us to not act - prosecutors say all the time that they don't get to choose their victims (meaning, sometimes they will have unsavory victims, but that doesn't make the actions of the defendants any less criminal).

I think that's part of what makes me so upset - how willing others are to say why they didn't do something, rather than say we failed. I wish I could remember the case, but there was a case within the last calendar year where the authorities stood right out there in front of the media and everyone and said, we missed this, we missed this. It doesn't bring anyone back anymore than the denial of responsibility, but at least it's some indication of sincerity in hopefully making positive changes.

Jill Writes Like She Talks

Thank you for sharing this

pamlyn — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 10:03:30 -0600

Kim, thank you for your excellent post and thanks, Jill for sharing this on Facebook.

This story reminds me so much how the Heidnik murders in Philadelphia. In the late '80s, Gary Heidnik kidnapped, tortured and, in some cases, murdered six women in his Philadelphia row home. I asked myself then, and now again, how these things occur. Sadly, I have come to the conclusion that, with all that is good about our society, there still exists a belief that there are throw-away people. The majority of our society looks upon the drug addicts, the indigent, the prostitutes, the homeless and, in some cases, the mentally ill as people who based on their actions are a drain on society.

Rather than looking at these individuals and saying, "there but for the grace of God go I", the prevailing attitude is that these individuals brought there misfortune upon themselves and therefore deserve the consequences of their actions. It makes you wonder who the real monsters are, the perpetrators of these crimes or we, who stood by an let their victims slip through the cracks.

Pamela Lyn

Outstanding post

Jill Miller Zimon — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 16:22:45 -0600

Kim, I'm so sorry that the case of Sowell and the women who he killed has had less coverage in the Cleveland and Ohio blogs - almost none from what I've seen. I've actually been thrilled that the Plain Dealer has been sticking with its constant and relatively thorough coverage - including a front page article on it today.

I have not blogged about it and have no better excuse than the reality that I'm barely at three or four blog posts a week since the election, if that. I'm going to post about your story and also will tweet it, link to it from Facebook etc. You just do a wonderful job of pulling the emotions together.

I don't know if this will make sense or not, but as I was finishing reading your post, what actually came to my mind as being somewhat similar in nature has been the attitude that I feel came out this week about the new breast cancer screening guidelines - just this authority-based proclamation that we're supposed to accept without question or risk being intimidated out of asking anything beyond even one question regarding how they could make the recommendations they're making. That is NOT to be construed as saying that I completely disbelieve them or anything like that.

But this dissing of us - Zach Reed, Connie Schultz, the survivors, anyone - pressing whomever is in a position of authority to explain themselves and then being looked at as though we have three heads for even questioning their decisions.

That the victims involve women, that the women were all WOC, that it happened in a city with the urban problems Cleveland has (low unemployment, poverty, declining population) make it seem all too easy for those in positions of authority to sweep the cases under the rug and make cliche-driven excuses for why they failed these women, families and neighborhoods (and no matter the reasons, it is a failure of some proportion - intentional or accidental - when 11 women disappear and aren't found until another possible victim gets away).

Anyway - thank you for writing about it.

Jill Writes Like She Talks

Thank you, Kim. Well said ...

Nordette — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 13:53:11 -0600

I'm glad that a public record is emerging about the people these women were, because for the past two weeks, they have been objects -- objects of pity, curiosity, horror and debate. Some of that is inevitable, given the horrific circumstances of their murders. But some of it reflects upon our understanding or ignorance of the struggles that families endure when someone they love has fallen prey to addiction. And yes, there is the fact that these women were black and poor.

Well said.

Nordette Adams is a BlogHer CE & you can find her other stuff through Her 411.

understanding the others ways

Vita lingus — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 21:14:28 -0600

Yes like our ex prime minister refusing to apologise to the stolen generation...Appalling and remarkably thoughtless and cruel......... Let alone the intervention in these communities, under the guise of caring for the children in these communities and

even though Kevin our current Prime Minister has now apolgised the intervention continues.... White anglo saxon society has stolen their culture their land their language .... Hideous and it is the case the world over ... Imperalism is alive and well in one form or another.. it is just becoming more mobile and complex as people try to redefine where they are connected to "PLACE"

Poor baby

lynngre — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 09:35:35 -0600

The image of her being carried into a hotel lift by that sicko is so sad. If only someone knew what she was about to go through. It's not about race. This happens in all areas of society. Poor angel. RIP.

Lynn

swedafrican.wordpress.com

Thank you Nordette

Erin Kotecki Vest — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 21:41:44 -0600

Taking a look now

Politics & News Contributing Editor Erin Kotecki Vest

Helping or Joining CASA is one way to help

Nordette — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 20:40:22 -0600

Erin, many cities have CASA programs, Court Appointed Special Advocates for children. One way to help is to become a CASA.

CASA is the only volunteer organization that empowers everyday citizens as officers of the court. In an overburdened social welfare system, abused and neglected children often slip through the cracks among hundreds of current cases. CASA volunteers change that. Appointed by judges, CASA volunteers typically handle just one case at a time—and commit to staying on that case until the child is placed in a safe, permanent home. While others may come and go, CASA volunteers provide that one constant that children need in order to thrive. (website)

If you don't have the time for such a commitment, you can always donate money to program. When the commercials run down here, I think I should do it, but I may have to stick to donations until I have the time and clear head to do more.

Nordette Adams is a BlogHer CE & you can find her other stuff through Her 411.

I don't know how to help

Erin Kotecki Vest — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 18:26:06 -0600

We need to do this. We need to do that. We need. We need.

But HOW?

I need to know HOW.

Politics & News Contributing Editor Erin Kotecki Vest

LOOK IT AIN'T ABOUT ME... AND IT IS....

Lovebabz — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 18:17:03 -0600

I've done a lot of good in my life...and I've done some fucked up shit. But I NEVER HURT A KID. Thank you all for thinking anything I had to say on this ugly soul-breaking stuff has value and merrit. I love being a mother...it is redeeming to me. It is healing and uplifting.

There are moments in all our lives that we must answer the call of our time. Children need to be protected. If they (our children) survive the ordeal of being sold into sexual slavery, they will need loving people to help give themselves back to themselves. That is the hardest work. There is not a day goes by that I do not have some memory. I carry weight on my body because to be smaller is to be 9 again and I am not ready to release or make enough peace to lose the weight.

I am not brave, nor courageous...I am tired of these stories that drag me back to a time when fear, pain and uncertainty was my life.

Let us all collectively pray that no more children suffer, then lets all get off our asses and do something...write a check...volunteer and YES adopt our broken, abused and abandoned children.

I may not be the mother my kids deserve, but I am the one who loves them with my life.

Be loving & Be in LOVE

LoveBabz

Denise — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 17:52:51 -0600

I have so much respect for your honesty and for your willingness to share such personal details about your life. We need more women like you, brave women who can stand up and say this happened to me and here's how I've moved on to be who I am.

Thank you.

~Denise BlogHer Community Manager
Flamingo House Happenings

Thank You So Much For Your Honesty

Megan Smith — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 17:14:44 -0600

Hi Lovebabz,

Thank you so much for your honesty. It was very courageous of you to talk about what happened to you as a child.

You're an amazing woman and your children are very lucky to have you as a mom and a role model.

Megan
BlogHer Contributing Editor, TV/Online Video

My Personal Entertainment Blog: Megan's Minute

My Review Blog: Meg's Rad Reviews

Twitter:@MeganSmith

Listening to Sapphire's book in iTunes

Bailey Alexander — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 13:44:52 -0600

I'm spending a couple of months aboard our saiboat in northern Italy so I decided to buy the book, turn out all the lights and let her words just wash over me for hours. It was intense but at the end, I was surprised by how much the other students' stories moved me, that was a clever, effective device. Allowing them to compare their pain, own their own story, move on independently.

I sat on a non-profit board in Seattle to help eliminate domestic violence. The issue is everywhere, I've heard it expressed in various languages in several countries, over the fence, walking by an apartment, in different modes of conflict and danger.

I certainly don't equate incest and rape with a color, community, let alone a country. Look at what we do every time we start a war, the first ones to suffer are the children that are raped.

This novel was something else though wasn't it, centered and more effective maybe because the community was known rather than any city, usa.

It was a brilliant use of language, really, in listening to Precious embrace the world thru gradual understanding of a language.

Prior to learning French and Italian, I lived in Rome and Paris so I was illiterate by choice, feeling vulnerable, even if only on the most superficial level, but it was valid. Speaking from somone that understands the power of her own language, the ability to control it, manipulate it, own it, I'm empathetic at the very least, on that level.

I'm not sure that anyone other than a performance poet like Sapphire could have told the story in such an effective manner, with that motive and that result. But I'm so grateful Sapphire went so dark and stayed so honest, if only so the light at the end of the tunnel could feel that much more worth the trouble of traveling towards......

Oh,Lovebabz

Mata H — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 13:01:16 -0600

I am so sorry that no one protected you. God bless you for protecting other children, and for having the courage to speak of it here. I hope that your story and the story of Precious helps other children. It hurts to bring such intimate and horrible pain to the light. But it helps heal as well. It has me asking what I can do now.

~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool