BlogHer - 20 somethings - Comments

good for you

Denise — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 14:33:25 -0500

Kickboxing is a great work out and an excellent stress reliever. Come back in a week and tell us about it, please.

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings

That's the cool thing

Southerngirl — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:32:38 -0500

My 12 year old is so into Obama it could make you gag. To him it is not about Obama being Black but that the man is smart!!! He says Obama makes it cool to be smart and a smart Jock at that. For which he gets a lot of flack but no more. To him this is just ordinary. Altough he is not so much considering my idea of engineering he thinks he will go into politics.

Michelle

I blog at http://www.mommycan.blogspot.com/

Still learning, still growing.

JessSanders — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:24:27 -0500

This comment hit me as particularly accurate:

In my own case, I realized that I needed to
develop a thick skin, feel comfortable promoting myself, learn how to
negotiate, stop being a perfectionist and create a professional network
— abilities that men are just more likely to have already.

Heather I am 365 days older than you, give a take a few. I too was brought up to have confidence that I could do anything I wanted to do with my life! I still believe that. But as focused and determined as I was as a young professional straight out of college, I also saw my male counterparts in the corporate culture where I work "naturally" do the things above better.

I first attributed it to the infamous "boys' club." But the more I observed, the more I found that as I learned these skills (self-promotion seems to be a particularly tough one for us gals, although by far one of the more important because who is going to help you succeed if not yourself?) I too was included into that circle. So it wasn't a men vs. women thing - then what was it?

My mom was such an amazing role model growing up, but her background didn't include the environment where I found myself now. So I found women in my field who had already been down my path could help me navigate and grow. Those mentors have taught me through our conversations and by their examples how to be successful not only for my assertiveness or ability to grow a thick skin, but also BECAUSE of my more "womanly traits" like compassion and relationship-building.

We "Net-Gen" adults may do things differently than the generation before. We have different expectations for our lives, different assumptions about the world around us. But we still look to the pioneers who raised us to continue to guide us now! The influence of our parents & mentors keeps the feminist flame alive through our actions.

The Glass Ceiling

debbiecluff — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:19:52 -0500

I really loved your article and it is so true that you keep hitting the glass ceiling and then there it is again. I actually was just reading a book by Kim Power Stilson titled, "Women Buy Everything" and has about three chapters about how she was constantly running into the glass ceiling and now is helping women create their own businesses. I went through her program at http://www.powerstrategies.tv and she actually has discounts for women owned businesses. Let's all work together and teach women that we do buy everything and to stick together in our marketing.

We can't remember but we do appreciate

HeatherB — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 11:11:26 -0500

My generation also comes off as unthankful but my God, we are and if people aren't then they should be. Hell yes, I am thankful. I am thankful for Gloria Steinem - though she can cause controversy - and I am thankful to people like John Lewis and Rev. Dr. Joseph Lowry. I'm pretty much thankful to anyone who has made it that much easier for me to be able to get my black female butt up and do what everyone else does every single day - work, thrive, etc. - because without them where would I be. But! I need to reiterate or drive home the point that even though we are appreciative we still feel like it's such a natural thing for a woman to be a VP pick and a black man to be a presidential nominee. And with that comes the realization that we don't feel the need to choose between a black man and a female, we get to choose based on the issues. It's a powerful thing.

But yes, we are very, very, very thankful and people older than us need to hear 'Thank You' more often.

Heather B. Personal Blog: No Pasa Nada BlogHer CE: Business, Career & Personal Finance

Great piece, Heather

Jory Des Jardins — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:54:14 -0500

When I read that essay in the Times I thought I could have written it at her age, and I'm 10 years older than y'alls. Some things don't particularly change, except perhaps the part that now you are expected to be ambitious. Waaaaaaay back, circa 1998, we were all ambitious, but less empowered in the ways we could show up in the world. I think tech/social media has made it possible for us to be seen without the resume attached.

Jory Des Jardins
writes on business and career topics at BlogHer, and on her personal blog Pause

Thank you

the farmers wife — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 08:57:36 -0500

Thank you for this post. It's not always clear to those of us who fought that battle back in the mid '60-s that anyone remembers or appreciates what has been accomplished. I like to say we dug from the center of the earth with a Dixie Cup spoon. At times I get angry that no one appreciates the advances that were made, and only focus on the fact that though we dug a thousand miles there are still two inches to go. Someone is going to have to define the glass ceiling for me. What is it? What does it represent? I certainly don't agree that success can only be measured as to whether you are sitting in the CEO's chair. And Gloria Steinem can kiss my butt. I fought so that women could define themselves and their own successes and so that NO ONE....not even Steinem could define or make those judgments.

Suzanne, the Farmer's Wife

Thanks for this insight

SusanCarleton — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 05:02:54 -0500

Enjoyed this post -- and what a great last line, loved it!

I live in a remote field in a rural country, and I started adulthood when you were well, starting (I'm trying NOT to rememer my wardrobe--or my hair!-- in 1982) so I'm a bit out of touch...mostly because I like it that way. But my daughter will be off to college next year, and I do wonder about the world she's stepping into. It's easy to see the facts--- technology, the politics, etc., but I still wonder what's it like to live in 'today' and make it all yours. You put your finger right on it and I enjoyed your review of it. Thanks!

Susan

stonyriverfarm.blogspot.com

www.carersgroup.com

I see writing about it as a

Mrs.Micah — Tue, 18 Sep 2007 15:04:29 -0500

I see writing about it as a way to make what I'm doing concrete. Maybe get a little accountability (the kind where you'd feel like an idiot if you didn't do something because you said you would, not the kind where someone's actually holding you accountable). It's about the process and the story.

It makes me feel less alone, too, like you said. So many people out there--making debt, paying off debt, starting 401(k)s, encouraging each other, passing on handy tips...I love it! :-)

One of the first blogs I

StaciCarsten — Tue, 18 Sep 2007 09:49:39 -0500

One of the first blogs I ever found was Suburban Bliss (a few years ago now) and at the time she had been writing about how broke they were, and oh my GOD people were mean!

I never write about money on my personal blog, and on my money blog I try not to write too much about ME!

Staci Carsten
All Pacific Mortgage
http://allpacificmortgage.blogspot.com/