BlogHer - postpartum body - Comments

I guess technically he would

Skye — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 14:24:19 -0600

I guess technically he would only have to stop eating at night.

Another hidden danger of sleep deprivation - blog comments that make no sense in retrospect...
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The solution in this house would be...

Skye — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 14:13:58 -0600

...convince the 9-week old baby who lives here to stop eating because it interrupts my sleep. 'Cause that won't cause any other problems.

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Go, Mir!

Mom101 — Sun, 25 Nov 2007 21:07:53 -0600

I'll be happy to join you in a paid position conducting research on the matter.

After all, I'm up all night anyway, right? Might as well be fat and rich.

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Quite Obvious

IAAdmin — Sun, 25 Nov 2007 20:05:34 -0600

Not only are the newborns keeping mothers awake, but at least for me, when my daughters were born, I worried about everything, so sleep didn't come easy, even when I had time.

Besides, aren't sleep and newborn baby an oximoron?

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Easy money, weight, and the vicious cycle

Nordette — Sun, 25 Nov 2007 15:26:01 -0600

But to spend the time and money to conclude that, Hey, we've already figured out that not enough sleep is related to higher obesity risk, and now we've gone and tested it with just about the only population wherein getting more sleep isn't an option, and then to tout the research results with inane comments like "We're not sure why mothers aren't getting enough sleep," well, I'm not sure that's even science.

Haha! Great commentary, Mir. When I see the press releases sometimes about certain studies, all I think is that somebody made money on making us scratch our heads. Who paid for this study?

But didn't we already know lack of sleep and obesity seemed to be tied together? I think it's part of the vicious cycle of sleep apnea: Obesity is linked to breathing troubles which is linked to sleep apnea, a disease that interferes with restful sleep, which leads to obesity. Oy!

Oh, wait. I get it. This is study is something to give young mothers another worry. Well ...

Nordette Adams is a Contributing Editor with BlogHer.org.

Hi Ladies, You asked 'how

candycouturezzzz — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 11:41:00 -0500

Hi Ladies,

You asked 'how long after having a baby should you wait until you get a tummy tuck?' - my answer would be 5 minutes - lol......

Seriously - My daughter is now 3 (I also have 2 teenage boys) & I wish I had had it done much sooner - just never thought about it. Have you got a PS in mind - you could always give his/her office a call & see what they say. You may want to give your body time to heal after childbirth. You also won't be in the right mind to be caring for a newborn if you have your TT too soon - in my opinion....

Candy

http://www.webyaa.com/category/beauty

raising my hand

KellyandCo — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 00:54:13 -0500

Guilty. Though I shouldn't say guilty because I don't feel ONE ounce of guilt after my boob job. My son is 3, I have been married for 4 years. I was happy in all aspects of my life~ except for my self confidence. It had always been somewhat low and the fact that my stomach had a little more "bulge" after my son was born didn't bother as much as the fact that it was coming out further than my flat chest. SMALL B and that's being generous. Now... I am a D, sometimes double D and I couldn't be happier. My husband didn't care how flat I was, but I know he wasn't against them going up a little ;) I love my boobs, LOVE them. They aren't PERFECT, but none of myself is perfect and I didn't expect perfection~ I expected that I could go try on swimsuits, cute tops without wearing a majorly padded bra from VS~ and now I can. And it feels GREAT!

Thanks

alyssaroyse — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 09:38:09 -0500

I suspected that was the case, but somehow it always seems worth pointing out that we need to support each other (sometimes with spandex, sometimes with stitches, sometimes with margaritas) whenever we are given the chance. I am as guilty as anyone els of making snap judgments and then having to back track to a place where i can respect anyone's decisions, as long as they do no harm.

That said, it's hard to say where the harm is in a situation like this - and it would be silly to say there is none. It's just so intangible, and so wrapped up in warped messages that we get from left right and center.

I would just hate to see more mommy wars..... We have it hard enough as it is. Personally, I think I have a hot body (though it looks barely related to the one I had years ago, and i don't see any like it in magazines anywhere.) But that is, as we all know, a state of mind.

So, how we get to that state is different for everyone. Bikrahm yoga does wonders for me, but it's all in my head (where my breasts firmly land when i'm upside down.)

Lifting spirits just takes a little more effort when battling gravity. But to each their own - I won't judge. None of us can.

Thanks for clarifying. (And I'll let you know if i have the girls put back to their previous latitude, with attitude.)
___________
Alyssa Royse
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crossing the line

Susan Wagner — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 08:46:27 -0500

Amy and Alyssa make a really important point here, and one that I flubbed in my post: there is NO right answer here. For some women, plastic surgery is a viable and appropriate option, one that works for them. For other women, yoga or running or a good bra and a pair of Spanx are the answer.

What bothers me the most about the "mommy job" is NOT the idea that plastic surgery can change your attitude about your body, but that EXTENSIVE plastic surgery is required. The Times article pointed out that women who come to consult about one procedure -- a breast lift, for example -- are often pressured into a package that includes the tummy tuck and lipo. What also bothers me is that this is being marketed specifically to mothers, as though great breasts will make you a better parent.

My intention here wasn't to criticize women who choose plastic surgery; as you all point out, that really is just another version of the Mommy wars. My criticism is of doctors and media who sell women a bill of goods about what it takes to be beautiful after a baby (or at all, really). I am tired of marketing that is designed solely to make us feel like we're failing, as wives and mothers and women.

I apologize if I stepped on any toes; that wasn't my intention.

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Nobody gets to tell me what to do with my body!

alyssaroyse — Sun, 07 Oct 2007 18:27:25 -0500

Thanks Amy - you are right. As people, what we really need to do is learn to accept each other for who and what we are and want to be. Personally, I'm periodically bummed when I look at my post breast-feeding boobs as they rush of for some secret encounter with my knees, or duck and cover in my navel. But they're my boobs, and I can do whatever I want with them. If i want to fold them into a bustier to look busti-er for the evening, my business. If i want to let them blow in the wind, my business. If I want to have a nice doctor put them back where they used to be, my business.

We do not get to judge each other for the decisions that we make with our bodies.

Is there a societal pressure to achieve some golden norm? Probably. But it is the same pressure that causes people to marry too young, try too hard to be too successful at what they do, drive the right car, live in the right neighborhood, etc... Pinning the weight of societal pressures on on cosmetic issues is no more holistic than pinning the "value" of a woman on cosmetic issues.

It is just as judgmental, just as dangerous and is the same problem but from a different perspective.

The simple truth needs to be that as people, we have the right to do whatever we want with our bodies, for whatever reason we want.

Should a woman who has fought a courageous battle with cancer, that has changed her body, be judged for having implants? Should a person who's destroyed a joint through a sports accident not re-build it because the degradation was the natural result of who they are?

Should someone who made one decision really get to judge someone who made a different decision?

I haven't had my breasts relocated yet, but I'm still thinking about it. And it's gonna take just as much inner-steel for me to explain that doing so didn't make me less of a woman as it takes for me to explain that their current location doesn't make me less of a woman.
___________
Alyssa Royse
JUST CAUSE
make some good news!
www.JustCauseIt.com

Whatever Works

abswyg — Sun, 07 Oct 2007 17:46:34 -0500

I find this subject to be much like the working mom vs. stay at home mom debate. There is no right answer. Whether it's lycra, yoga, hairy eyebrows, makeup or a makeover (the mommy kind) the point is that women should choose what works best for them and then feel secure in their choices.

Amy S.
Up With Moms (http://upwithmoms.blogspot.com/)

Also, spamming your post to

Super Jive — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 23:58:34 -0500

Also, spamming your post to say I second yoga--I do viniyoga which is good for creaky noobs, and I am thrilled to report that after my second child I am now down to being a C-cup. It's not all bad news. Hooray!

Your Pop Culture Librarian also writes almost daily at I, Asshole.

I am NOT saying there's a

Super Jive — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 23:56:37 -0500

I am NOT saying there's a relation between plastic surgery and self esteem, but I feel better about myself now than I did ten years ago before I had my girls, so I personally think less about how "bad" I look. I see pictures from then and I was younger and thinner, but I am so much happier now. So I say, BEHOLD MY BINGO WINGS. It is a summer night and I am out taking the air!

On a related note, I had a playdate the other day with a mom at my kids' school who got really thin and busty immediately after her divorce, as she had to go back to her pre-marriage work--stripping. She confided that she had herself "fixed up" to erase the effects of her two kids and to feel better after a hard break up.

I kind of said, "Wow!" because I figure to each her own, but she went on to say that if childbirth is being run over by a truck, then the "mom job" is being run over...and then the truck backs up a few times. Yipes! Whenever I what if doing anything, I go over to the awful plastic surgery website, which gets me down from the ledge.

***************
Your Pop Culture Librarian also writes almost daily at I, Asshole.

No Lycra, Just Yoga

Grace Davis — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 20:46:55 -0500

Bikram Yoga, lots of it. It makes you feel good about your body. And if you feel good about your body, you'll laugh at the thought of that "mommy makeover". That's all I have to say.

Grace Davis
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Contributing Editor Life/Elders
State of Grace

lycra and boning

kyranp — Sat, 06 Oct 2007 20:14:21 -0500

Foundation undergarments. That's all I have to say.

Kyran, Notes to Self