BlogHer - pain - Comments

Thank you so much..

Lumina — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 12:35:36 -0600

Christinajeanne,

Thanks so much for taking the time to drop a line AND for having me revisit this post. I had no idea the "italics" were not the way I posted them, so I was able to fix it. :) Italics, in my writings, always indicates a channelled message, and not me speaking.

Yes! The picture! Photobucket!

Haappy Thanksgiving!

I love the picture

christinajeanne — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 22:50:29 -0600

your words touched me so deeply. thanks for posting.

The saddest part of all

grannysu — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 14:32:18 -0500

The saddest part of the situation you describe is that all of these relationships started with love and caring. I remember my divorce and the puzzlement of how we ended up where we were, so far apart that we didn't even know each other.

I was luckier than most in that we divorced in a time when you could make your own agreement and the judge would approve it--and my ex stuck to his part, as I did to mine. It was still painful; I felt as if my heart was being ripped out of me, even though I no longer loved him and wanted the divorce.

But how sad to be in a place where anger and hatred are all that is left of love--that and the children who are so often caught in the crossfire of angry ex-spouses.

Granny Sue

Stories from the Mountains and Beyond

www.grannysu.blogspot.com

susannaholstein@yahoo.com

Divorce in the Courtroom

rebellious thinker — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 14:02:11 -0500

This never-ending process of going to court is ridiculous and seems to work right into the hands of these manipulative men work. Why are the courts handling our divorces? And why is it judges, of whom there are not enough and who don't really seem to get a grasp of what is going on, responsible for the health and well-being of women and children?

I filed in November because he is not complying with our PSA (what a shock, he's not paying and he harasses me) and because of delays and ineptitudes, I won't--maybe--have my day in court until November.

Laura, www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com

It's pretty close to the

Wyliekat — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 13:52:01 -0500

It's pretty close to the unhappiest place on earth, isn't it? My first trip to family court was enough to crush my brain. Now, I've got another one coming up. I can only hope that it's a) quick and b) non-combative. It could honestly result in happiness or horror.

I feel You

Southerngirl — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 13:30:08 -0500

I remeber my frequent vists to that place. I was not as fortunate as you as my ex did not show up the first 3 times and I had to go back more times than anyone should be required. I do get how you can see the silver lining as I can support my kids with or without help and so many of those peole there needed and were not getting this money for whatever reason. Spending a day there truly makes you grateful for a peaceful existence.

Mcihelle

The lesson, I think, is about control

JustKaren — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 09:05:22 -0500

Laura, Wilma,

Thank you for your feedback.

The truth is we can only control our own behavior. I spent much of my marriage trying to control my ex's angry reactions by anticipating them and then choosing my actions accordingly (often untrue to myself). Now I realize that I only have control over myself, my choices, my perspective. I can share my insights with others, but whether or not they choose to consider or accept them is on them.

I think it is another liberating lesson, acceptance. Things are as they are and people will be as they will be. I can choose to stay or go, to change my circumstances and actions; to stay healthy and calm admist the angry storm. I do have the power of choice.

Karen

Negative vs. Positive Energy

rebellious thinker — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 07:23:36 -0500

You have me thinking about those people who hurt themselves, who live in a cloud of negative energy. I'm wondering if we stay with people who are so negative because we think that we can help them, that we can show them how goodness and nurturing can be wonderful? But the enterprise (marriage) fails when we realize that we have not brought them to our side, but, instead they are bringing us over to their side, and that is when we end up in family court.

Laura, www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com

Negative energy be gone.

Wilma Ham — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 23:19:27 -0500

Hi karen, hi Laura.

I am so pleased that I now know that negative energy exists, that we can feel it and that we don't have to keep it or have it affect us too long.

Great that you survived and isn't sad to see how people really hurt themselves.

Wilma Ham

www.wilmasblog.com

"Family" Court

rebellious thinker — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 21:24:36 -0500

Both of your posts really speak to me today. I'm glad to know that even there you were able to find a silver lining. I'll try to remember your insight next time I am in divorce court--in November.

Laura, www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com

beautiful

christinajeanne — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 00:10:19 -0500

I think this is a beautiful post!