customer un-serviced

mrs. tinnell

let me start by saying... i worked a call center, i know how bad it sucks.  i know that i am one of the one hundred calls of pissed off people that you are going to get today.  i know that my problem is not yours, and that in your sincerest efforts, and to the best of your ability, you are trying to make me happy.

i am not mad at you.

i am mad at the idea that just because you have a human being on the phone instead of the "please press..." lady, that doesn't mean the company has done all it can to make customers their priority.

wait.. take a deep breath...

today, i had to deal with customer support for this product. the product is a luxury.  it's not a need, and it falls far far far below most anything else in the want category.

i think mostly i am just bitter that i got rooked by a salesperson.  i am a slimy good for nothing sales person.  well i used to be.  i have sold air to people and had them beg me for the opportunity to buy it.  can you believe that?  air.  my dad was a sales person.  his dad was a sales person.  i think the entire irish side of my family are sales people.   so typically, i can sniff out sales jive and cut the crap with a butter knife.  i have taken on the best, i have taken on... my dad.

this guy got me.  when i called for this product, all i wanted was pricing.  i didn't even know what cable company we were going to use.  this guy was like a lion on a wounded deer.

me:  hi, i'm interested in your product, would you be able to send me some info?
him:  sure... (insert some al green music here)  shush baby, this will only take a minute or two.

i walked away with two boxes, a free remote, a six month free trial to this product, and a stuffed doll.  a stuffed doll?!  for free?!  i didn't even know i wanted your product, and now you are going to send me some tchototchkes??? (definition of the word, if you think it's just keyboard gibberish.)yes yes yes!!  i was in consumer bliss!

later, that evening, i had to in turn "sell it" to b.  needless to say, he is not impressed with the sales razzle dazzle.  ever.

b: "so let me get this straight... we are paying for this service, and additionally we have to pay for this service which does essentially the same thing as the that service?"
me: [head hung in shame] "well yeah... and we got a free doll..."

so here i am, post orgasmic buyer frenzy, with a box that doesn't work properly without another part that is going to cost sixty dollars, plus i am not paying what i agreed to? yipee!

so i call, and speak to meredith, landon, mark, terry or terri, and one unnamed supervisor who did a wonderful job at listening to me patiently and even making all the proper sympathetic noises in all the right places, were completely helpless to do anything to help me.

why have we as a society turned to stuff that we throw money at, and never get what we wanted?  i have been on the other side of that phone, i know the system sucks.  when you are just the peon, and the poor person you are on the phone is actually being pee'd on by the system.

i want to start a revolution!  i want to free meredith, landon, mark and terry or terri from their lives in hell.  unchain yourselves from the desk and say... "bill gates, fix your damn computer errors or we aren't going to pay you any more of our hard earned money!"

anyone with me?!

p.s. the end of the story is, after i eventually almost start to cry on the phone to mr. unnamed supervisor who could do nothing to help me, b steps right in, and closes the deal, getting us right with the product that we actually wanted, without buying more crap, and getting us a refund.  i was about to spend thirty dollars more to just get off the damn phone.

ooooh, it looks like there is an opening at the customer service call center, gotta go... gotta go brush up my resume and cover myself with the sales slime, once again.


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