Date with a Neuroscientist
By Hiranya on August 26, 2007
Thats two hours I am never going to get back.
Last week a friend calls up and tells me about - lets call him - Mr. Rightish. Rightish moved to DC some months ago from Manhattan, to do some research for the Pentagon, and is looking to meet people, perhaps a nice girl etc. etc. Good looking guy, very well educated (PhD, teaching at NYU), 31, 5'11, dark hair, dark eyes.
As anyone who knows me even in a cursory fashion knows, I have a thing for a intelligence, nerdiness, and in particular, brain surgeons and rocket scientists. So I thought - brain-scientist? I can work with that. And he looked cute from the picture (which my friend forwarded). I hate blind dates but this might just be worth it.
So we met for drinks at a downtown euro-trashy watering hole (his choice, not mine). Things started off well. For the most part Rightish was who my friend said he was - a well educated, confident, rather nicely groomed dude.
He told me about grad school in San Diego and studying sleep patterns in rats, and then about his job here researching biochemical something or other for the US military, and then about missing NYC and how small DC is, and then about... . I feigned interest, asked questions, and smiled in all the right places.
So here's the thing - at no point in the entire two hours did he make any attempt to ask me one single question. Like, maybe - "So what do you do in your job?", or perhaps "where are you from?", or at least at a bare minimum, "so you grew up in Switzerland? Nope. Nothing. Zilch,. Nada. Not even when there were definite pauses in the conversation or at the clear END of one. There was just silence, until I could bear it no more and asked another question. And he responded with another diatribe.
Once, just once, I think he asked me something, but then proceeded to glance over my shoulder at a fly on the wall or something that must have been really fascinating behind me, while I responded. First, are there people like this, really? Second, it was a humbling experience, because usually men are, um, pretty enthralled by what I have to say.
Anyway, two very long hours later, when he was walking me over to the metro, we got talking on comedy (and I think, ah finally at least an interesting mutual topic!), and then he drops the bomb. "I hate Jon Stewart and his ilk - so talentless"
"Er, but why?? The Daily Show is very funny and very clever."
"Its not clever at all. All they do is make fun of people. Easy. I could do it with my eyes closed."
Yeah. WHATEVER. I don't think I could ever really date someone who doesn't get the Daily Show. That would be like dating a Ultra-Right Wing Republican. OMG - maybe thats what he was?!
And this, my friends, its why I don't date. Why I don't like meeting new people. And why its all such a COLOSSAL waste of time.
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