The Dating Dilemma
By SaraCrisóstomo on September 18, 2013
Dating is extremely difficult for Single Mothers. Worrying about the safety and happiness of your children while trying to maintain a relationship with an outsider can be stressful. Recently, I decided to re-enter the dating scene and found more drama then I bargained for.
After a night out on the town with a few of my friends, the men got the message loud and clear: Sara is back on the Market! It was only a few hours after I returned home when the men started calling, texting, and randomly appearing on my door step. Although I was flattered at the attention, I knew these guys were not what I was looking for. I quickly turned most of them away. There was only one or two guys I invited over occasionally or went on dates with, but nothing serious.
Francisca, one night, asked if we could set down and have a serious conversation. I was puzzled at this request, but agreed. It turns out my sexy ex-boyfriend that has been hanging around last few days is also the father of Francisca’s 6th grade boyfriend! I have no intentions of having a serious relationship with this man. (They're called Exes for a Reason!) We are just friends having fun. Francisca feels like we shouldn’t have any type of relationship other than saying "Hi" at PTA meetings because it will ruin her relationship with the Son. It was hard keeping a straight face while she told me her concerns. I found this really funny, but frightening at the same time. I never thought something like this would happen.
I spent the next few hours alone, pondering on what to do about this situation. Since when did a eleven year old child have the authority to pick who I can and can't socialize with? On the other hand, I do not want her to feel like I don't respect or care about her feeling or opinions on these matters. Whatever type of puppy dog love Franci has for the son would be gone by the end of summer. So ending my interactions with a friend permanently would not make sense. Suddenly thoughts of Jerry Springer calling my name to come on stage flashed through my mind, I made my choice on how to correct this situation right then and there.
Francisca was right, how dare I venture in on her turf! She has been interested in boys for the last two years. This particular boy and Francisca have been playing a cute game of cat and mouse for most of the school year. Here I am stepping in and taking it all away. Bully is now the proper label for such actions. There are unwritten rules and boundaries for dating men associated with the family. Franci is my beautiful daughter and I would die for her, so telling a sexy ex-boyfriend to hit the road can't be that hard, right?
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