Dear Hair: I Love You, I Hate You
Originally posted on ThoseGraces.com
We need to talk.
No good conversations start that way, but you’ve been acting strange lately. Not the kind of strange most people would question, but strange nonetheless. For three years, you were out-of-control big, wavy and curly. You always looked good and I didn’t have to blow dry or comb you. I loved you.
But now? You’ve completely changed. You’re nearly pin straight à la Marcia Brady. Where did your personality go? Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me? Just tell me so we can fix this and go back to being best friends.
We’ve had our ups and downs, but never like this. Starting at 11 years old, I dyed you red like Dana Scully. Then dark brown a few times. And, yes, there was bleach. Every time you recovered, but now you just seem to fall flat, without personality. And, hair, I miss your quirkiness.
Sure, some things are easier now that you’re flat, straight and, well, boring. You’re easy to comb and dry. I don’t have to pick up a flat iron to make you look polished. But you look horrible if I neglect you. Hair, we used to thrive on neglect. In fact, you looked good without any attention. A kind of silent beauty, if you ask me.
Please don’t let this be a turn for the high-maintenance-worst.