Dear parent blogger – the best writing advice you’ll ever get (ever)? Delete your first paragraph

Parent bloggerOf course everyone wants to hear about how little Johnny threw up or pooped in the back of the car in his best bib and tucker on the way to Grandma’s for Christmas dinner. And, quel horror, there were no clean clothes to be had to change him into.

Cos' no-one has ever written that before.

As a story, an anecdote, that will be interesting to you and the other person in the car, tops, and if it’s only you and little Johnny in the car that leaves... yep.

Okay, maybe a few close friends and family who are too polite to yawn in your face; to tell you that your blog story is no different from other blah blog stories.

Newbie parenting bloggers: ever wonder why you're not as big as (whomever) who seem to write about the same parenting topics? Grab your pencil and take note. (Only important, of course, if you are ambitious for your parenting blog in that way.)

In the main, then:

1. No-one cares about your kids.
2. Everyone cares about an interesting story.
3. An interesting story that could possibly happen to their family.
4. Forget your kids per se.
5. No-one cares.

You are adorable. Your children are adorable. Jump straight in and make your story adorable.

So, the best piece of writing advice I got when writing about kids and family life especially?

Delete your first paragraph.

No matter how long it is and how long you’ve worked on it and lurve it.

Delete it.

Let’s see how that story stacks up now without the preamble of the whole getting ready to go to Grandma’s, and how gorgeous little Johnny looked in his, whatever. And how Daddy didn’t help and you had to clean up the whole sorry mess on your own…again…and…

Sorry, I just nodded off lil’ bit.