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Sparkle (1)
Were you dumped recently? Are you going through boyfriend/husband drama? Are you in a bad place where you’re feeling unwanted, alone and depressed?
Well you’re definitely not alone. I’d take a wild guess that millions of ladies across the globe are going through the same exact thing as you are. Right at this moment. They might not ever admit it out loud, but they are.
Before you do something drastic (or stupid) or continue to wallow in self-pity take a step back and look at yourself. Yea, act like you’re a ghost stepping out of your body and looking at yourself weeping in bed or snapping at everyone you love all because of some GUY.
Listen to your ghostly self and listen to me: He isn’t worth it honey.
“Yea Jayelle, easy for you to say…” you might mutter under your breath.
No hell no, it’s not easy for me to say that at all. In fact it’s a little painful for me to admit that I was right where you are right now.
I was so depressed at one point that I didn’t even want to get up out of bed. I was a mess of my formerly confident self. I didn’t contemplate suicide — I just contemplated wasting away into a flurry of sand like a character out of the Prince of Persia.
Only now do I realize, after some time and reflection, that what I’m saying to you is true:
He isn’t worth it honey.
Now that I look back on the situation I was in, I can hardly believe I let something as trivial as a breakup take me there.
But it wasn’t the guy. I don’t even remember what happened with him or care right now. It was me. I was just getting mind-fucked by life.
I read this wonderful article that described some of these issues.
As the author said, “I had to force myself to dig deep into my past to understand the roots of my own dysfunction."
A Look to the Past
I realize now that insecurities that developed from my distant past fueled the dysfunction of my recent past. I was teased often as a youngster — I was a swan case. I only came into my own when I hit the final years of high school. In college I was quite the social butterfly. But before all of that I was a bit of an “ugly duckling.” So when someone, anyone, shunned me it brought back those old feelings of insecurity.
So, my honey, my sweetie, my cherry dumpling, why not start with that… what is the root of your dysfunction that caused you to become so depressed just because someone doesn’t want or like you?
After we conquer that question, let’s talk about when you’re going to wash all of that moist mascara off of your pillow and get ready for some much needed medicine — I'm talking about vitamin G, Girl Power baby!
Ready to chuckle and pull yourself completely out of that funk? Stay tuned for my upcoming blog posts…
Jayelle Hughes is the author of Men Don't Matter, a novel that presents a hypothetical world where the roles are reversed between men and women.
