Did You Hear About the Time Lindsay Lohan Stood Up Matt Lauer?

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Picture this: You're Matt Lauer. You're feeling pretty good about that. I mean, YOU ARE MATT FREAKING LAUER. You shave, you get dressed, and you go to work, which today involves interviewing THE once-talented-it-girl-turned-total-hot-mess of the moment and you are all pumped up to ask the hard questions, and maybe...just maybe...get some well-lit mascara soaked tears in the process.

But when you got to her house to start the interview?  B*tch stands you up. Just like in High School.  Her super huge "handler" comes out and tells you Lindsey doesn't want to see you any more. And if you're not off his property in 5, 4, 3, 2...

And now it is you, Matt Lauer, crying the mascara soaked tears.

*   *   *

Okay Lindsey Lohan, it's time we had a little chat.  You've been given more chances at straightening yourself out than Vanessa Bryant gave Kobe after that whole rape charges inconvenience.   You're a sweet girl.   You were even a hottie before you let Dr. 90210 go all Lara Flynn Boyle on your face, but standing up Matt Lauer moments before you are set to appear on The Today Show?   Girl....that just ain't right.   

Courtesy Zuma Press

When you found out you failed your alcohol test, was it your own genius idea to go into hiding?   Or did Mama Dina suggest that zinger to you?   Because Linds...what were you looking to accomplish?  Sympathy?  Weird points?  Whatever your intention, let me make this abundantly clear: YOU DO NOT LOOK GOOD RIGHT NOW, FROM ANY ANGLE. 

And sweetheart, for an actress in this town, that ain't a good ting.

Listen to the Judge who let you off the hook for failing that alcohol test, buddy:

...Los Angeles Superior Court judge Stephanie Sautner warned Lohan to behave herself as she nears the end of an expected 35 days of home confinement, and banned her from holding further parties.

"Don't give people reason to hate you. Don't do stupid things that fly in the spirit of the court's order," she told Lohan.

Okay, I could go on all day because Lindsey Lohan is my favorite/most mourned hot mess, but Matt Lauer explains the cancelled appearance in his own words on The Today Show, HERE

But then come back because I want to know what you guys think about this debacle.  What the EF was Lindsey thinking?  Huh?   TELL ME!