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So I figure that I should just come out and say that I very recently almost quit my job. My "real" job. The one with the salary and the health insurance and the dental plan and the yearly bonus. Chalk it up to a brief moment of insanity when the proverbial straw broke the camel's back. I felt done.
The reason? God, I wish it were better and stronger other than hitting my limit of irritation but it was because of a coworker. A single coworker who is not a superior and whose faults I could list in paragraph form in bound book that would make Tolstoy jealous. But I will not go there because this isn't about how difficult this particular person is or that I had been warned, it is about my reaction to the difficulty. The way I stormed out and decided right then and there that enough is enough and that it would be a cold day in Hell before I ever helped him again. Let's just say that the way I reacted was probably not one of the finer moments of my career. In fact immediately after when I was full of rage there was this sudden jolt when I realized my supreme ridiculousness as I marched down the street to find my boss and immediately told him that I announced my intentions to quit but obviously I hadn't quit and he went to get a glass of vodka and told me that I would not be quitting. Ever.
I doubt that I am a perfect colleague and I would never assume such. I do know that when it comes to entering a new environment (a year is still considered new, correct?) where it is normal for people to stay for at least a decade, it is hard to ease your way in and try to find your groove. But I've been trying to go with the fow and do what I need to do and to ignore everyone else and to focus on minding my own business as opposed to worrying about what Joe in cube seven is up to right this very moment. I just don't care. I'm not an apathetic employee when it comes to the organization as a whole I am just not interested in the comings and goings of those around me. Of course I have been greeted by the utter opposite by those in my surroundings which leads to the unpleasantness and then gossip and then disgruntle employees and well, for those in an office environment; Have you ever noticed that more often than not all of the rumors tend to come from the same source? It all goes through the same channels and tributaries to spill out and it feels as if it is the job of one (or a few) to make office life generally unpleasant.
So how does one cope? Like besides quitting because anywhere you go there will be difficult people. Not everyone will get along and as JEMi from InMyHeels said, it would be nice to get a bit of a warning when about to enter into the land of difficult people:
Wouldn’t it be nice, when beginning a new job, for there to be fine
print about the type of atmosphere you just got yourself into? How
were you supposed to know that in this shiny new office with freshly
sharpened pencils that Miss Thing to the right likes to let the team
take the work…all the time. Or that Miss Thing to your left gossips
for breakfast, lunch, and all the snack times in between?
But we don't get a warning so it is our job to not only figure out how to do what we have to do in order to get the precious paycheck but also to teeter around those that love nothing more than to invoke annoyance in our lives. Lucel Juliana has a list of Do's and Don'ts when dealing with difficult people. All of which might seem like the obvious answers but when in the throes of reiterating to your colleagues that your job is really none of their business so perhaps they should just shove it, well you try keeping a level head:
DON’T…
- Take it personally. When you take it personally, you get emotional and lose the ability to think logically.
- Go on the attack. Stay calm and keep your comments brief and don’t say anything out of anger and frustration.
What I love about this list is the Don't Take it Personally suggestion. Which
