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Own Your Beauty is a groundbreaking, year-long movement bringing women together to change the conversation about what beauty means. Our mission: to encourage and remind grown women that it is never too late to learn to love one's self and influence the lives of those around us - our mothers, friends, children, neighbors. We can shift our minds and hearts and change the path we follow in the pursuit of authentic beauty.
Sesame Street has produced a new song for kids designed to teach black girls to "love their hair." Called, "I Really Love My Hair," it's totally adorable. When it was posted online, that prompted a whole lot of people to view it and react. Lots of discussion about race and hair and how some black women torture themselves and spend a fortune so that they can love their hair.
While I understand all of that, I don't think it's solely a race issue. How many women do you know who love their hair in its natural state? Or, for that matter, how many of us love all the parts of ourselves in their natural states?
Of course we want to raise girls who love themselves and feel great about their appearance. How many of us succeed? I feel pretty good about myself and overall, I like to believe that I set a good example for my daughters, but, alas, not perfect. I have announced many times that I dislike my wrinkled neck and if I had life to live over, I'd wear sunscreen at a much earlier age. (Yes, I'm aware that in the scope of life's regrets, if that's my only one, I've done pretty well. Sadly, it's not my only regret. It's just the only one that is relevant to this post.) And, Shira once remarked that she's surprised that I color my hair because she thought I'd be a woman who'd want to age gracefully. Gracefully! Moi? No, I'm going kicking and screaming ... oh and dyeing my hair.
Having said all that, I do work at loving myself the way I am. When I run a few miles, I am grateful for the body that got me through it, despite that body carrying more pounds than I'd like. (Especially lately.) But, can't I love myself and want to change some things about me? Is there a way to teach daughters that loving yourself is not mutually exclusive to working to better the parts you don't love?
How can moms set examples that move our girls forward with security but still enable us to be honest with them about our flaws? Carroll girls, how do you feel about you? How did you get that way?
Alexis Writes:
I'm not going to pretend that I always liked the way I looked. I had a lot of body issues growing up, and it messed with me emotionally. I'd be lying if I didn't admit that those same issues don't creep up now and then. As a result, I know I am not often in tune with how I look, whether it's positive or negative. I'd also be lying if I didn't admit that there are many beauty luxuries that I enjoy that also make me feel good about myself.
I get my hair cut and highlighted every eight weeks, and in recent years I started getting manicures. My sisters don't enjoy these luxuries nearly as much as I do, and I think they think it's a little ridiculous to spend the money I do on my appearance. But I love the way my hair looks and having my nails done makes me feel clean. I think of it this way -- I work really hard to have the body that I do. I exercise, eat right, and take needed medication that sometimes makes me sick. I like the way that my body looks now, and
