Dog's Perspective vs. Reality

Dog's Perspective vs. Reality

All your life, you will be faced with a choice. You can choose love or hate…I choose love.  ~Johnny Cash

Joel,-Jill-Aunt-Heather-Piper-1980s
Me & Joe with my dog Jill. We were on the swings in our front yard. 1980s

There's always moments in life that just plain work your nerves.  Sometimes it's Kyle, my family, work, a trip to the grocery store etc.  This time?  The dogs!

I mostly consider myself a cat person, even though I've always had dogs my whole life.  I appreciate those friendly barking beings and I most certainly love our dogs, Scooby and Seven, but they can sometimes be a pain in my bottom.  Both are Labradors, Scooby blond and Seven noir.  In truth, they are a couple of good dogs and I wouldn't trade them for the world, but it would be nice to have a babysitter on speed dial, especially when their corks are heightened.

There are so many good things I can say about them and really mean it, like they are friendly (at least Scooby is with us), somewhat well-behaved (at least Seven is with me) and they are full of love (only Scooby with us, Seven loves playing with the neighbor dogs and kids).  But then they have their hiccups too, so let me vent for a moment or two or three.

I'm sure my perspective is off slightly, since I've also been watching Nicole's dog, Avery.  I've had her for two weeks now and I still have another week to go.  At least, that's what I'm hoping for.  I just found out Nicole may need to go out of town for work again, then after that out of the country for a month.  Guess where that leaves me?  Yep with a third dog.  When did I become the dog whisperer?  I'm going to have to add dog wrangler to my resume.

Pap-&-Pudge-1970s-Aunt-Heather-Piper
My pap with his dog Pudge. 1970s

Avery's a Rottweiler, pit bull, Doberman mix. (Something like that).  She's a little over a year old, so she's still a puppy.  A very vocal annoying puppy.  Nicole took her to be professionally trained by those who actually train dogs for the CIA and such.  Acorn (as I like to call her) knows how to listen and be good, but like all puppies (or kids) they know how to push major buttons.  Avery's major malfunction?  She is constantly barking and whining, for no apparent reason and she chases my cat.  Major no!

I'm sure having Avery here with Seven and Scooby has caused everyone to be off his or her game.  Regardless, I'm going to speak freely about those actions that irritate me the most, mostly about Scooby and Seven.

There is the obvious, every time I go to lace up my shoes I get bombarded.  Both dogs instantly jump up, start panting and breathing heavy in my face, with their noses not even two inches from mine.  I can't even get through their bodies to put my shoes on.  They believe every time, and I mean EVERY time I put on a pair of shoes, it's so I can take them for a walk or a hike in the woods.  No!  I am not your personal walker!

Seven-&-Storm-looking-at-each-other-2013-Aunt-Heather-Piper
Seven & Storm (a.k.a. Lady Fluffington) Storm loves Seven! Seven could care less. Picking grapes.... 2013

They used to only do this when I would put on a specific pair of tennis shoes, the ones I walk them in, but somewhere they decided any shoe will do.  Then, they  jump around barking and crying in excitement, LOUDLY.  I can almost handle that, ALMOST.  Until they start knocking things over and jumping on my feet.  Let's face it, a couple of nearly ninety pound Labs jumping in a small space leads to disaster, whether they are happy or not.  Unfortunately now-a-days, they get in my face even if I'm putting on a pair of stiletto heels.  Come on guys, I'll let you know when it's walk time!  Sad part?  They taught Avery to do the same!

Then, when I try to build the trust and give them some freedom to roam around outside in the yard, they all of a sudden disappear.  Even if I'm watching and simply take my eyes off of the hounds for a moment.  A SPIT SECOND!  They take off for the woods for a four or five hour plus, walkabout.  Forget it if they are spotted making their great escape.  Once they're at a certain distance away, I swear they give me the middle finger and continue on their journey, only to find them on the porch hours later, totally muddy, panting and exhausted.

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