Don’t Kill Cupid!: A Message for Divorcing Moms
Pink hearts, red roses, chocolates galore, February is the month for romance and love. We all love to be in love, but when your heart has been broken this can be a tough and lonely time. Even if romance feels like a distant memory and passion seems like an ancient relic that belongs in a museum, resist the temptation to boycott or ignore Valentine's Day.
This month and this Valentine's Day make peace with love by asking your self a new and important question. As Resilient Moms, we understand the power of NOW and recognize that our joy is ours to imagine and create.
Besides, WE DON'T GIVE DIVORCE THE LAST WORD ON OUR HAPPINESS.
So here's the question of the month: In this next chapter of your life, what do you want in terms of love and relationships? Really take some time and answer this question because it's important.
First, push past knee-jerk reactions like "anything but my ex" because it is too vague an answer. "The opposite of my ex" probably isn't honest.
Second, take the focus off of what you ex did or didn't do in the marriage that has ended.
Third, instead focus on what you want and require in a partner or mate moving forward. You know more than you ever have in your life about what really
works for you in a relationship. So use that perspective to move forward into JOY. What qualities do you want in a mate? What relationship skills or life experience do you hope your mate will possess? What are the deal breakers for you? These are just a few questions to get you started. Until you begin this conversation within yourself, there's no point in getting "back out there."
I know some of you are saying that you don't want anyone right now. That's fine, take your time. There's no rush. You might change your mind at
some point and you have lots of life left to live.
In case you’ve forgotten, let remind you:
You deserve to have a satisfying relationship in your life.
You deserve a partner who loves, appreciates, and accepts you!
You deserve to be happy, to treasure someone and have them treasure you in return.
You deserve JOY!
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In the March issue of The Resilient Mom E-Zine, I’ll answer the most frequently asked questions about dating.
Copyright © 2010 Jennifer Baszile. Do no copy, circulate, or quote without the author’s permission.