Don't Let Anyone Touch My Kid!
By vanessa.spiritoso on June 26, 2014
HUS: "I'm not saying its ok; I'm just saying that I wasn't there."
Sometimes I feel that my husband would never agree with me in my concerns when it comes to something he mother does that I feel will put our children in danger.
His responds is usually, 'She raised me.' But I have to remind him that he also had two older brothers looking after him as well. Who's looking after The Don?
I said, "She teaching him that it's ok to let a stranger hold his hand or if the stranger offer their hand its ok to take it."
HUS: "You don't want to be too lax but I don't want my mother to say stay away from my grandchild because his mother doesn't want anyone near him."
Me: "I'm not saying that she has to stop being herself, she has to be cautious when it comes to the kids."
My husband and mother in law are the same when it comes to situation like this. I think they are both too lax when it comes to the kids. I think I had every right to express my concern over my son and it doesn't matter if it was my mother or his....they are my children.
This is why I'm teaching The Don about expressing himself and learning to say no to people if he's not comfortable doing something he doesn't want to do and not go with strangers. In the picture above, The Don looked uncomfortable and my mother in law told him to hold this man hand. I have to make it clear to my mother in law that if The Don or Bambino when he's old enough doesn’t want to do something or it makes them uncomfortable don't make them do it. My boys will need to speak up and say no matter who it is. If that person makes them do something that they are uncomfortable doing, then they need to come to me and let me know. I'm going to do my due diligence in making sure both my boys know it's ok to say no to any and everyone and not feel guilty. Children are impressionable and if they feel uncomfortable doing something and a parent, grandparent, sitter, aunts, uncles etc says they need to do something, guess what? The child will do it to please the adult even at their own discomfort. If I can't make my mother in law or my husband understands, then I will teach my boys to understand that they have to do what makes them comfortable and to SPEAK UP!
Parents, don't be afraid to speak up when it concerns your children's welfare because it's your mother, father, mother in law, father in law, aunt, uncle etc. Your children need to know that they can come to you if they have an issue and not be worried that you won't defend them because it's grandma/grandpa or Aunt Sally or Uncle Lou. If your motherly instinct tells you something wrong or something makes you uncomfortable, you better listen to it. It's not about hurting the family members feelings it's about doing what you feel is best for your child. Justifying the behavior wouldn't make the behavior acceptable, you're delaying the inevitable. Protect your children. You are their first line of defense.
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