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Don't Make Me Put You in the Naughty Chair: Supernanny is Back

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ABC's Supernanny is back on the air tonight, launching its sixth season of naughty chairs full of wild things. I'm happy Nanny Jo is returning. I don't watch it every Friday, but I do like a little Supernanny now and again because it stirs up a juicy conflict for my inner reality-show-loving child. Like Pavlov's dog or a kid who has been Frosted, the show's Men at Work theme song "Be good, be good, be good be good be good, be good, be good, be good, be good Johnny!" makes me sit up a little straighter to — just for Nanny Jo — be good.

Seventh Annual Family Television Awards - Show

But at the same time Supernanny makes me feel scummy, because I know I'm about to be bombarded with wide-eyed "how do people live like that?" moments that I should be ashamed to enjoy.  The frosting on my personal regressive conflict cake:  Jo Frost is often super hot working the secretly-sexy-librarian-taking-control archetype, and surely it's wrong for me to objectify a stern Madonna in that stereotypical, manipulated way.  Right?

 
Be good, indeed. 
 
Supernanny producers have been hosting casting calls throughout the Southwest this month, with the show hoping to sally forth for a good long time.  There seems to be no end to mums and dads willing to immolate their privacy and pride.  Fixing dysfunctional families is the stated promise of the show and the books and forums in the Supernanny brand, and the producers certainly have found some notably unwell scenes.
 
In addition to focusing on communication, Jo models a 3-point strategy to get acting out kids under control: consistent, authoritative guidance; positive reinforcement, reward and attention; and, systems for time and chore management.  Fairly basic behavior modification--of the parents, not the kids, with Jo trying to transform the ill-equipped, isolated, depressed, overwhelmed, anger-prone, disorganized, checked-out, formerly abused or neglected, unconventional, or mid-guided, simply ineffective grown-ups.  When the parents become more productively engaged with any of Jo's suggestions, the kids seem to do better.
 
I'm quite a bit more laissez-faire than Jo, and too Rogerian to get into the level of withholding reward that is needed for stern behavior mod, plus my kids are really great older teenagers, so I don't watch the show for advice.  To me, the show is appealing in the way that Wife Swap, Hoarders or Intervention draw on our fascination with the inner working of dysfunctional people.  This type of reality show stretches our concept of the diversity of psychological experience even within our North American culture, while reassuring viewers that most of us don't have to work to be good, because in comparison, we are very, very good as is.  The old Prince Charming promise of rescue from the dysfunction around you is offered as well. 
 
My younger son hates it when I have Supernanny on because of the inevitable screaming or bizarre behavior of the children or the parents.  I like his complaints, because I then get to remind him of how lucky he is to have such a fabulous mother because I neither scream at him nor ask him to hide in the attic while I call 911 and news stations to report him missing on a helium spacecraft ride, and he is compelled to agree.  (Or he won't get a gold star on his chore board.)
The second best part of Supernanny is the ending, where Jo goes back to visit the happier family that has found insights and a smooth flow for their home life.  It is nice, even if dubious, to wrap up each hour with a happy ending.  The second best part of Supernanny is that the parents on Supernanny make me feel like I'm the lovechild of Maria Montessori and Mr. Rogers.  That effect lasts a long, long time.
 
Here are some blogged reactions to the divinely superior Nanny Jo.
 
Margaret blogged on Take a Walk with Me about similar feelings:
My 9 yo daughter decided to spend the day watching the Super Nanny marathon. It was culture shock for her! LOL! One child called the mom a B-word. She looked at me wide eyed and said Mommy, I'm shocked, did you hear what he said! I'd be dead! All his mom did was wash his mouth out with soap!

Bingkee writes an interesting blog called I Love/Hate America where she posted about the American cultural issues evident in the parenting shown on
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Leighbra 5 pts

We're a no-TV house until January (family resolution), but the kids and I used to watch SuperNanny....

I'm pretty sure that they loved it the way that I love zombie movies. They would be sitting with me, with this face- :O glued on for 50 minutes, thinking "Oh, those kids are gonna get it"

Occasionally I even reference back to the show, "Do you remember how EMBARRASSING it was to watch those kids on SuperNanny!? Why are we having this conversation in front of other people?!"

And *whip cracks* they're back in line! Nanny Jo has no idea the good she does, even without using her tips and tricks.

cluelesscrafter 5 pts

SpendWisely, you don't need to say that "sadly" you use Supernanny to help guide your parenting.  Just because her show is on TV doesn't mean you should disqualify the merit of her advice.  I actual believe you can learn a lot from TV and do not think that it should be viewed as pure garbage.

I first learned the word "litigious" from the Oprah show (makes me laugh that a bit), which goes to show that if we teach our children how to be observant they will be able to decipher what entertains and what edifies.  

We can always learn.

http://www.thecluelesscrafter.com/

SpendWiselyTexas@gmail.com 5 pts

Sadly, my husband and I use Supernanny reference points in determining how to discipline our son. There are many times when we would probably be less structured or disciplined (because it's easier) but the thought of having a child who turns into one of the children on Supernanny is horrible. (Our son is a sweetie by the way.)

Spend Wisely Texas ( http://www.spendwiselytexas.com ) - Living Well and Spending Less in Texas

cluelesscrafter 5 pts

I watch Supernanny because Jo is able to tap into the root of the dysfunction and draw it out of each member of the family.  She is capable of deciphering the real issue so that you don't feel you are watching some mock self help show; rather, you're witnessing a systematic unraveling of the issues that prevent parents from parenting with authority and children from accepting it.  She is a tough woman.  I like how she stands up to parents who tear her down by forcefully reorienting their attention back to the real issue:  dysfunction in their family.

http://www.thecluelesscrafter.com/

Deb Rox 5 pts

Oh, then you may have the ability to invoke a Supernanny accent if you need the world to snap to your command.  I have an accent like that, but it's fake, and as I speak it tend to veer towards Cockney, then German, then who knows what, so it's not too convincing.

Deb
www.debontherocks.com ( http://www.debontherocks.com/ )blog
www.3smartgirlz.com ( http://www.3smartgirlz.com/ ) consulting

Expat Mum 5 pts

Jo makes me sit up straight and I'm English!