(VIDEO) People, Listen: Why You Should Never, EVER Touch the Pregnant Woman's Belly
"Your belly is so adorable! Can I touch it?"
When I was pregnant, I heard that line from people almost as much as I heard the infamous and insulting, "Are you sure it's not twins?" I hate when people touch me in general, let alone when I'm hugely pregnant. I mean, I don't even go get massages and have to feel pretty desperate to get a pedicure. I have this thing called "personal space" and you, dear stranger, dear Great-Aunt Gertrude, dear small child, need to stay the heck out of it or risk my wrath. Would you lean in to touch my belly under normal circumstances? No? Then why would you do it when I'm clearly uncomfortable in the first place?
It's weird how people don't seem to care about an expectant mother's wrath. Just odd, really. Haven't people ever heard of the Mama Bear phenomenon? Or pregnancy-induced mood swings? I guess not. But maybe if they had to endure the wrath of waking the fetus... maybe then they'd care.
Kristy Lopez-Bernal wrote and made a video depicting just that, and I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants. (And I'm not pregnant. Anymore. Residual effects, you know.)
Directed by Moujan Zolfaghari of The Onion News Network, UCB, Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, Kristy Lopez-Bernal wrote this one for the Upright Citizen's Brigade. And both deserve a virtual high five from all of the pregnant moms around the world. No belly bumps, though.