Eating Disorder Battle for Control

Robin's view

 

I was speaking to a new friend lately about my journey to have Weight Loss Surgery and how I struggled with Binge Eating disorder. Why does everyone think they know the answers? 

This week I have been directly speaking to ED and while it works sometimes I'm also battling internal demons successfully. I've obsessed about Donuts and drove past DD and I refused to go to Walmart at the end of the day because this is when he has the most influence. Its so hard to drive by when its a constant talk in my head but I won many battles this week. It feels good to win occassionally and build up to win more often.

Knowing that my WLS is coming in about 5 weeks I need to win the immedate battle and REFUSE to put myself in the situations in which I could lose. If I don't go out at night and there is nothing in the house to binge on, than I'm able to do better. I have had only 2 bad nights this week. 

I also watch Youtube videos and gain support from people who don't know they are helping me. But without the online support I would be alone in this battle. I'm just glad to have the chance to gain support however it comes.

If your battling ED, Describe it, put a face or a imagine in your mind and imagine this thing meeting you face to face. How would you hurt it? Then realize that those actions will feel better, kicking, hitting.... but its only going to slink away to trigger a binge and laugh at us again. Beat it when its rearing its ugly words to just get one donut or you need salad so go to Walmart and while your there it has donuts...... URG he is ugly and sneaky.

Good luck all.

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