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I write Stirrup Queens when I'm not reading other people's blogs, cooking, or chasing after my twins. I'm the author of two books: Life from Scratch,...
 
 
 
 

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Explaining Holidays to Kids

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It happens every so often -- you're talking to a kid and they innocently ask you what Chanukkah-Christmas-Kwanzaa-Solstice-Diwali-Zamenhof Day is all about (because they celebrate something else), and you start stumbling through the answer. I mean, I know what Chanukkah is about BEFORE someone asks. In my head, it is absolutely, perfectly clear, and I can even visualize miniature Macabees engaging in guerrilla warfare.

But when Rita's daughter asked me about it over Skype, it sort of came out as a bumbled mess. And I knew it was a bumbled mess from the confused look on her face.

So let me start over again in explaining Chanukkah, and I would love you to chime in and explain your fall/winter (or, if you're in the Southern Hemisphere, spring/summer) holiday. Whatever celebration falls during the winter months. Because in continuing the conversation with Rita, I realized that I was woefully ignorant of most other religion's festivities beyond a cursory amount of information.

Explaining Chanukkah to Non-Jewish Kids

What is the best part about a playdate? It's the other kid's toys, right? I mean it rocks to go to their house and see what things they have that you don't and get a chance to play with those toys for a while. Playdates would be a lot less fun if everyone owned the same toys and had their rooms set up in the same way and had the same snacks in their house. And once you look at the world that way, you realize that it's really cool that we're all different.

So if someone came in and said, "you can't be yourself anymore; you have to be like me," the world would become a really boring place. But that's sort of what happened to the Jews a long time ago.

This guy named King Antiochus wanted to take over Jerusalem, so he came in with his army and they fought the people in the city and ruined their temple. And once he was in charge -- like a big bully -- he told the people there that they couldn't be Jewish anymore. And not only that -- he took all the things that were important to them and ruined them just to show them how little he liked their religion. And this went on for three years and the people were pretty miserable.

Then, a man named Mattathias and his five sons fought back. His most famous son -- Judah -- became the leader of the fighters once their father died and people called him Judah Macabee (which meant "Judah the Hammer"). And finally, they won. And to mark the end of the war, they cleaned up the temple and made it perfect again to show that Jews were allowed to be Jews once again.

And now, many years later, we still remember that big bully who told everyone that they couldn't be themselves and they had to be like him. And we celebrate because being unique won out.

And that's sort of the simple version of the story.

To celebrate, Jews light a candle each night on the chanukkiah (a type of menorah), increasing the number of candles by one every night. So on the first night, you light one candle. The second night, you light two candles. On and on until the eighth night when all eight candles will be lit plus the shamash, which is the helper candle used to light all the other candles each night.

We eat a lot of fried foods such as sufganiyot (jelly donuts) and latkes (potato pancakes). We have a toy called a dreidel or a sevivon that is part of a game. On each side of the dreidel is a letter which are the initials for the sentence: "nes gadol ha'ya sham" or "a great miracle happened there." (In Israel, dreidels have a different set of letters so it reads: "new gadol ha'ya po" or "a great miracle happened here.")

So that's Chanukkah in a nutshell (and to all the adults reading this post, I know I know that it gets a bit more complicated than that, but remember, we're talking about religion with kids).

And now, how would you describe Christmas,

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Momofacrew 5 pts

I have a background in religious studies and I can give lots of history and 'facts', but many lessons have taught me that the best people to explain faith are those who believe it, those who know the authenticity of their faith.
Thank you for this, being different is cool, and being able to express that individuality, exceptionally cool. =)

Momofacrew 5 pts

'And oh, my dears, children deserve magic. All the magic we can muster.'

I still look at my children (oldest is a tween) and am awe struck...at the magic that my husband and I did THAT! ...and then like you said, we try our best to keep the magic in their lives, and often the magic is in the unexpected, not just the traditions and spiritual days...but a rainy day when they think they are just staying in and we all suit up and go play in the rain and mud...magic to boys. ;-)

Nancy Hill 6 pts

One of my favorite memories of my daughter when she was small was the year she asked for a dreidel for Christmas. Inclusive thought is a wonderful thing!

Nancy
N. F. Hill ( http://www.nfhill.com )

Jane Byers Goodwin 5 pts

Parents have the power to separate ordinary days from extra-ordinary days; we've always had that power, but we all too often forget to use it.

Parents don't have to depend on a calendar or a toy ad or a television special or any kind of media; if adults are in charge of a household (and I sincerely hope adults are in charge of your household), NOBODY tells 'em what to do or when to do it, except themselves.

We can indicate holy-days, or any kind of special days, by simply using the special dishes, or lighting candles used only for special purposes, or singing songs reserved for certain times of the year, or bringing the outdoors in and dressing it up, eg evergreens and holly and mistletoe.

We can tell our children that our family's special, set-apart days make us so happy that we want to share with each other and make each other happy, happier even than on the ordinary days. Special days bring out generosity, and a desire to make others' wishes come true.

No holiday is limited to a calendar day; it happens when we say it happens. If grandparents can't get a flight until after the New Year, have Christmas then. Etc.

Oh parents, USE your powers and make a few days extraordinary for your children! And when they ask why, tell them your family's take on it. And when they ask about other families' special days, simply tell them that all kids' parents have this power and some of them use it differently than we do. Go into details as pertains to their age and level of understanding.

My point? Do I have to have one? I guess I can drag one in by the hind legs and say, simply, that parents can make certain days glow and shine, and that when we do this, our children remember these traditions for all the days of their lives.

Please, parents, go forth and make certain days shine, for whatever reasons that best suit your family. encourage curiosity and questions, about your own and everybody else's traditions. Combine things. Create your own traditions.

Children who grow up in a home that shines brightly for a few days, several times a year, will become adults who know how to make magic for their children.

And oh, my dears, children deserve magic. All the magic we can muster.

"Don't be content with being average. Average is as close to the bottom as it is to the top."

Jane blogs as "Mamacita" at Scheiss Weekly, ( http://janegoodwin.net )hitting the fan like nobody can.