So many people are afraid of failure that they fail to start. We look to paragons of success around us and never see the series of failures that happened along their path. For some reason we think we need to be immune from failure if we are to amount to anything in our careers, our businesses, our lives. Yet the very opposite is true. it is not failure but what we learn from failure that is the key to success.

If you are afraid to make a move because you fear failure, get over it. I'm here to tell you that you will fail, at something. It may be big, it may be small, or it may be colossally big front page of the news screw up, but at some point you will. Unless you're living your life so small that you're living only to arrive safely at your death, you're going to make a goof somewhere. So embrace failure and you'll be far more likely to succeed on the whole, where it really matters. This quote from Mary Pickford sums it up nicely:

If you have made mistakes, there is always another chance for you. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call "failure" is not the falling down, but the staying down. ~ Mary Pickford

FailCon is a conference that focuses on just that - failure and the lessons learned by those who failed and fixed it.  Think about it. What could be more valuable than gleaning the lessons learned from a failure and then passing on those lessons to others so they can avoid the same pitfalls?

In Epic Fail: Startup Lemons Turned to Lemonade, Dana Oshiro details the premise behind FailCon. I particularly like Gnip founder Eric Marcoullier's comments:

"Misery is nature's way of telling you you're doing it wrong...Since we've changed directions, we're currently working on a new platform and we've released more features in one month than we had in the previous 6 months. I don't know if we're going to succeed, but we're going to find out a lot faster now."

Listen to the nudges from nature, the voices of wisdom, and signs from the Universe.  I can remember when I first had the inkling to start my own business and was petrified of failing.  My mentor coach at the time suggested I read the John Maxwell book Failing Forward.  I really liked the book because of the spin it puts on failing (and failing quickly) as a way to learn and move you forward.  Get Rich Slowly has this to say about the book:

But what I eventually learned was that failing at one thing is not failing at all things. And, in fact, failure is a necessary part of growth. Life is filled with trial and error. In order to walk the path to success, you need to make some wrong turns along the way.

Wrong turns are totally ok.  They give you perspective and make you aware of what path isn't the right one for you.  You can look at them in trepidation or with a sense of exploration and adventure.  The former keeps you paralyzed or digging a deeper hole and the second allows you to be malleable in a way that allows you to transform failure into future success.

Hand in hand with failure is learning when to call it quits.  Seth Godin's book The Dip was all about knowing when to quit and when to stick.  Kirstin Carey has a great post called "Rudy Should Have Quit - Maybe You Should, Too!". She asks the golden question:

Where is the line between when you should give up and when you should push forward towards your goal?

I'd add to that - When should you bag what you're doing, learn from it, tweak it, trash it, whatever, and then come out of the gates again on a clearer path to success?  You need to be able to answer this for yourself and your career or business.  Otherwise you become one of those people who end up stuck forever but with that perseverance always wins at any cost attitude.  Yes perseverance is important but sometimes other, wiser messages are telling you to fail and then move forward.

You need to show up and take a shot at what you most want.  Failure is part of what it means to be a success.  This quote from basketball great Michael Jordan puts it in perspective (after all if the greatest men's basketball player ever can fail this much...):

I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. ~ Michael Jordan

Some other thoughts on failure and learning from it:

• Lessons from Failure - Part I
• Why are we so Afraid of Failure?
• 7 Habits of Highly Innovative People (#3 the part on making mistakes)

So get out there and prototype your life a little faster by being willing to embrace failure as a natural part of the journey.

Paula Gregorowicz, owner of The Paula G. Company, offers life and business coaching for women to help you gain the clarity, confidence, and courage you need to up-level your business and life. Get the free eCourse "5 Steps to Move from Fear to Freedom" at her website