A Few Days...

My fiance will be going to his parents house with his son for a few days since it is spring break and he hasn't visited in a while. I would go but I have commitments and besides, I am not well liked or recieved by this Christian family, in fact, the matriarch loves and cherishes the ex-wife dead beat who put her son through hell and I am loathed. There is even an homage to her honor in the foyer of their wedding day, I made this known that I felt it was inapropriate and made me feel even more so like an outsider and the excuse, it's for the child, well, if it is, then save it in an album and give it to him when he is older like I do with mine for my kids, I don't decorate my walls with my past failed relationship.You know, my instructor told me once in Etiquette school that Good manners are all about making people  feel comfortable all the time. It is basic in the way we interact with each other. Well, I certainly no longer feel welcomed or comfortable. I don't really care anymore, We will be gone soon and I can finally have my peace and feel like I am not the thorn in anyones side. I relish putting those miles in the middle. I have never ever been made to feel this insignificant even by my ex-mother in law who was certifiable. I'm just waiting for the holidays to roll around again, who knows, I might be spending them alone because heaven forbid I am invited to spend them with her family who I am not a member of. I have just reached my boiling point in this and now I am all steam and whistle because I do not want to really blow my lid off. I sometimes lay in bed at night and wonder what the heck did I ever do to deserve such indifference and disdain aside from voicing my beliefs and opinions which seems to be all this person ever does. My poor sweetheart sometimes has to sit and listen to me rant and he is good to listen and not say much, he sees my points and sometimes disagrees and sometimes agrees but he likes to remain neutral but he doesn't want to always go alone without me. Also, it is one thing to do this to me, but another to treat my children like pariahs, that is just down right low.

During this time, I will take the opportunity to do some cleaning and rearranging of our bedroom. I will most likely not even cook since my son generally cooks for himself and I usually an content with a bowl of cereal for dinner or even a fried egg. I am going to go through my spring decorations also and see about putting them up as well. I will miss the sounds of chatter and I will most definitely miss my sweetie but he has promised to be back early enough on Friday so as to not have me be alone on what will be a tough day for me being my mother's birthday.

I have to also learn how to give injections to my cat, poor thing is getting worse and I have to go to the pet store this week and get some medicine and needles and penicillin to treat her. She has been there for me since she was born, she has been there for me when I was feeling alone or sad and I do not want to see her suffer.

Well gentle readers, It is time to say Bon Nuit and I will blog to you tomorrow.




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