Five Things I Meant To Do In 2009

You know those things that seem to become fixtures on your perennial to-do list? Those resolutions you make every. single. year? Yeah, those things. Well I've got a few of my own and I'm going to share five of them with you. Why? Because I love you.

Which brings me to the first item on my list:

1. Say "I love you" more

Love, love, love. I am all about the love. My Twitter bio even says "Loves everyone." And yet I don't say it as much as I would like to. There are a few reasons for this. One is that I tend to be more reserved and not as expressive as I admire in others. I'm an introvert and some of it is necessary energy conservation but it is also not having really figured out how to get past my, as a reporter (to my great dismay) once described, "prim and proper" facade. And so I forget to say the word "love" (in a way that doesn't reduce it to trite, trivial or rote overuse) to friends, family and other loved ones as often as I'd like.

Also, oh how I admire those gals who wear their confidence on the outside and own their hotness rather than wear their past hurts and disappointments like a suit of you-can't-touch-this tough girl armor. Which brings me to another thing which is that I've been on a hunt for new object of my affection for what feels like forever. And that seeking? Totally and completely taking place in my mind. Not the most effective approach. I also seem to have some commitment issues since I keep picking up and moving, not staying put long enough for anyone to catch me. So once again, "find a boyfriend" rolls over from 2009 to 2010.

Related: Sarah Dopp is going to get everybody to love everybody and BlogHer CE Liz Rizzo refuses to get cynical about love

2. Exercise

I was off to a great start in 2008. I had an awesome trainer kicking my butt in a cool, quirky little gym and then the great recession hit, business slowed and the expense got cut from my budget. But, hey, I'm resilient and resourceful and I started a walking half-marathon training program - just my two feet and the great outdoors - and that fell by the wayside. I need a taskmaster to keep me motivated and on-track with the exercise thing. I need a dog.

Dogs gotta be walked. For the first time in 14 years, I had no dog to walk in 2009. So I'm thinking this is the answer to get me back to exercising on the regular. 2010 will be the year of the dog.

Related: Chihuahuas being my dog of choice, and apparently they are giving Pit Bulls a run for the money as most-surrendered shelter dog in California, I'm thinking that, like Katherine Heigl, I can make this happen.

3. Video blog

One of my dreams is to host a TV talk show. I love television. I love talking. And while I can be a grouchy misanthrope at times (see: introvert, me) I truly do mean that "loves everyone" crap I spew and secretly, I think people are fascinating. Truly. Everyone has a story to tell and I like hearing them.

I've joked that I will start as the "Oprah of Oakland" (alliterative - nice, huh?) but I really want to be the Maria of all media. But that's kind of hard to do if I'm not on camera.

Sadly talking is not doing. And I meant to do more doing in 2009.

Related: BlogHer CE Melanie Nelson wrote a brilliant post just for me titled Using Video to Build Content. Melanie also introduced me to Selfish Mom who does simple and awesome little daily video posts. She'll be a role model for me, for sure (in other words, don't be surprised if I totally rip off her approach).

4. Own my data

Here on BlogHer I write a lot about owning myself and my ish. But one thing I really meant to do in 2009 was to figure out how to own my data and content. I've got a ridiculous number of blogs spread out across several platforms. I probably have written the equivalent of a few books by now and have the content to fill several courses. However, it's not terribly useful for me spread out across the digital universe sitting on other people's servers. Like Elisa (who has an even more ridiculous number of bloggy homes), I want one fabulous centralized queendom. A space that I can not only rule but search, organize and port.

Long ago, I tried to convince my S.O., the developer to develop an app that would regularly back up my blog posts...text and images and formatting...into some kind of file I could control and maintain.

2010: The quest continues

Related: BlogHer CE Laura Scott asks the existential question of the 21st century: If you don't control it, is it really yours? and Steve Gillmore at TechCrunchIT is Calling Twitter's bluff

What’s odd about this is that most observers consider FriendFeed a failure, too complicated and user-unfriendly to compete with Twitter or Facebook. If Twitter believed that to be the case, why would they endeavor to kill it? And if it were not a failure? Then Twitter is trying to kill it for a good reason. That reason: FriendFeed exposes the impossible task of owning all access to its users’ data. Does Microsoft or Google or IBM own your email? Does Gmail apply rate limiting to POP3 and IMAP?

5. Being impeccable with my word

Technically, this is not something I forgot to do in 2009 but something I want to continue to do better. This concept can be expressed in lots of different ways. Don Miguel Ruiz in his book The Four Agreements describes it as:

Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

I've improved in the power of my word aspect through taking (and re-taking) the complaint-free challenge. However I can be better in the sense of saying only what I mean and being able to honor my word by committing to less. Looking back over 2009 there are some things that I said I would do that I did not fully follow through on and complete. I'm disappointed that I let myself and others down as a result.

In order to be able to truly do everything I say I will, I have to understand myself better and be clear about what I not just want to do but can do. And that will mean saying no more often even when I truly want to be able to help. Being more clear and saying no will not make me a bad person but rather someone who can be in real service.

Related: BlogHer CE Paula Gregorowicz asks Do You Honor Your Commitments? It's as if she's looking right into me! Eerie. Stop that.

Join me!

What did you mean to do in 2009? Don't be shy! The mysterious "they" who tell us how to run our lives say confession is good for the soul so share your list with us - in the comments, in BlogHer chatter, on Twitter or on your own blog. Cleanse and link!

And here's a bunch more bloggy goodness:

Sara at On Simplicity: 37 Easy Ways to Say "I Love You"

BlogHer CE Susan Mernit: When do you say the L (Love) word?

Crabby McSlacker of Cranky Fitness at BlogHer: "Too Busy" for Fitness this Holiday Season?

Debbie at Healing Moves Foundation: Exercise - A Gift for Everybody

Jessica Gardner at SAHM Answers: Walking Your Dog Better Than Gym Membership

Tara Parker-Pope at The New York Times Well Blog: The Best Walking Partner: Man vs. Dog

BlogHer CE Gena Haskett: Thoughts About Buying The Right Digital Camcorder

Tatiana at A Very Good Year: 6 Tips to Help you Start Vlogging

JD Lasica at SocialMedia.biz shares why Jeanette Gibson and John Earnhardt of Cisco say "vlogging is better than blogging"

Eric Blue: Personal Memex

Chris Guillebeau: The Art Of Non-Conformity: Annual Review: 2009 Business Lessons
"Thankfully, I didn’t learn this lesson by screwing up somewhere; I just learned to say no more and more often."

Natasha at Becoming Something: Secular Philosophies That Have Changed My Life

Karen at Living Well on Less: Just because you want to do it doesn't mean you have the time

BlogHer CE Maria Niles prepares for all these things and more in 2010 at PopConsumer.