It’s bad enough we women are constantly dieting already, now we have to put our suitcases on diets also or buy them tickets that could cost up to $77. per bag. The days of packing six extra pairs of shoes for matching outfits are over. You have to be clever and lighten the weight of your luggage. Why wasn’t I a Hare Krishna with only one orange sheet to pack and no make up to wear?

But alas, the older I get the more products I use in the morning. Now before a trip, I buy pint size baggies, squeeze what I perceive is the daily amount of each cream I need for the length of the trip, make sure it’s under 1 ounce, and challenge the scales and scanners at the airport.

I thought I had won the award for my recent 11-day trip to Spain Italy and France with 2 suitcases weighing in only at 26 lbs! When I told my friend Vicki she couldn’t wait to retort with her stats as she had just gone to Thailand for 3 weeks with an 11 lb. roller board. Of course, she does not wear any make up, so that must be the difference. If you ever see me without lipstick on call an ambulance!

I pack an outfit for each day with 1 pair of good jeans, 1 pair of black dress slacks as each can be worn twice with a different tops, both casual and dressy. That’s four outfits right there.  Laying out clothing on the bed and packing the exact amount of outfits you need for the number of days with only one spare outfit for unexpected events, seems to work. I have a large sling over the shoulder bag from Mephisto that holds all important reading material, inflatable neck pillow from Magellan’s, and toiletries in case I am stranded. That leaves arms free for a carry on. I keep a lightweight fold up bag in my suitcase in case I buy souvenirs, which serves a carry on which costs nothing.

When I was a child it was big deal to fly and you got all dressed up for the privilege of going up into the sky. These days not only you have to pack and prove you are not a terrorist, are environmentally conscious and financially responsible, you have to dress in what is close to pajamas. You have to get undressed to pass security and be comfortable in case you are stranded or stuck on the runway for hours. Plan on wearing that same outfit twice, on both travel days of the trip. 

As a child, my first flight was at the Marine Terminal at La Guardia Airport.  I remember standing on a ramp with a crowd and the man announcing, “Women and children first.” It truly was a cattle call for a propeller plane on a four-hour flight to Miami. It was so noisy I couldn’t even hear your Mom speak. The lunch was a little sandwich meal in a small white box and a drink in a cup that was a great novelty to me, almost as magical as the food coming out of the little compartments at Horn and Hardart. 

I write this sitting on a flight to San Antonio, TX on Spirit Airlines. I just paid $2.00 for a cup of tepid coffee, and  $5.00 for a couple of snack bites. You can’t do anything without a charge.   If you select your seat online, the cost is an additional $10. or $20. for a larger seat.  If you pay for a checked bag online, the cost is $15, and if you check it at the airport it’s $25. The plane is half empty at 7 am and the people who paid the $10. up charge for online seat selection are really pissed.   I got to spread out and nap on 3 empty seats. You have to constantly find the bright side.

Last month my daughter graduated college in North Carolina. My husband and son packed the college belongings into a van which they drove to Boca Raton. My daughter and I flew. We found out that the bookstores have caught onto the new airport culture and created programs. You can buy a book at one airport, return it at the next one for a 50% discount on your next book. It might be a long way home! By the time my daughter  and I arrived home, my husband and son wer  watching TV! They had gotten home hours before us! Wait a minute, we flew and they drove! Something is screwy here!

Traveling by air these days takes stealth of heart, entrepreneurial insight, extra cash and a secure knowledge that there is a God laughing at clocks and calendars so you may as well relax and enjoy the day wherever you are.

Snow@sobercelebrations.com