Forget Einstein: Let Me Introduce You To The Theory Of Momativity
We all know Einstein was a genius. But he was never a Mom. So I imagine he never had any interest in or reason to study the theories of Motherhood and just why it is a Mother's work is never done. Well as you know I have been a Mom now for a smidgen over three years (not that I'm counting or anything) and have been actively investigating this phenomenon throughout that time and I think I may have finally come up with the answer. So here it is fellow Moms. Let me introduce you to <span style="font-weight:bold;">Aging Mommy's Theory of Momativity: 2 TTC = 2 X 2 NJND</span> Note: TTC = already identified tasks or chores that you need to complete and take off your never ending "Mommy To Do" list (Tasks To Complete otherwise known as TTC) and NJND = new jobs that need to be done if you are going to be able to ever, finally, get the first two tasks completed (New Jobs Need Doing, otherwise known as NJND) Basically this means that for every two tasks you try to accomplish with children around, getting them done will create at least four more must do jobs in the meantime. These new jobs will of course distract you from the two tasks you originally set out to do meaning that often, the original tasks identified do not in fact get completed. Let me explain by way of an example. This morning I wanted to clean up the kitchen (one TTC) and sort out the laundry (second TTC) and then I planned on spending some time making cookies with my beloved daughter. So I explained the plan to her and before I could so much as get started Mirabelle asked me for her "box". The reason she has to ask for this box is because in it are stored lots of smaller boxes, each containing different colored beads, letter dice, fluffy soft balls, bows and other delights that she likes to sort and play with. Cleaning up after a play session with "the box" takes forever which is why it is stored on a high shelf in the closet in the hopes that she will not ask for it and want to play with it too often. But she is smart, and sensing my "weakness" (aka my need for her cooperation in order that I could get something, anything done around here) she asked for "the box". So before I could start my tasks I had to get down "the box" and help her open all the various little containers inside it (equals 1 NJND). A little while later while I was still working on the kitchen, she decided to experiment with carrying large quantities of the beads, balls and other delights wrapped up in the skirt of her dress and then came to show me her new receptacle invention. Guess what - it did not prove to be an efficient means of transportation for said beads and balls and so they ended up scattering all over the tiled kitchen floor. Which meant I then had to help pick them all up so that neither of us would crash to our deaths on the hard floor after tripping up on a bead. You would be amazed just how far a bead can roll and into what tiny hidden little corners under the counters they can trap themselves. They had in fact scattered every which way. Needless to say it took forever to pick them all up (equals the second NJND). A short while later and Mirabelle had lost interest in the beads and balls and wanted to do something else. I told her she needed to tidy up the contents of the box first. She agreed, but only if Mommy helped, so I did (equals the third NJND). When every last bead, ball, bow and other tiny little object had been packed away for another day (hopefully not too soon) Mirabelle got her art box out. I left her playing with her coloring pads and crayons and went back over to the kitchen area. Next thing I hear is "Mommy can you wipe my hands?" I look around and find myself confronted with a somewhat different looking Mirabelle. Her face and hands are black. Her new coloring pad appeared to be the cause of this phenomenon. I had deliberately chosen it because it had a "stain free" pen set, but apparently the manufacturer had omitted to state in big bold letters on the packaging that the black paper you color on to release the rainbow colors underneath is NOT stain free and as soon as you touch it with a toddler's sticky hands which they then transfer to their mouths, everything becomes black! So off we went to the wash room to deal with the mess - and it took a lot of washing to get those stains off (equals a fourth NJND). So there you have it - my two tasks to complete 2 TTC, created four new jobs that needed doing before I could complete them 4 NJND. Which is why for us Moms our To Do lists are endless and our work is never done. In case you are wondering I never did get the laundry sorted out, but we did make cookies and somehow Mirabelle managed to use three entire jars of sprinkles which necessitated the mother of all clean up operations on her and the kitchen. But the look of concentration on her face as she decorated them all by herself was priceless! Oh - and I just stepped on another runaway bead!