I Can't Accept Him

Parents get frustrated, even desperate when they cannot make their child be different (i.e. be good.)  We can even get to the point where we don't want to be around our traumatized child and have nothing positive to say. I understand that; however, check out this comment, "I can't accept him this way."  If you don't accept your child the way he is, then that same child will not have a cheerleader to encourage positive movement forward. Our children need to see their preciousness in our eyes, even when their behavior is ugly and unacceptable. That acceptance says they are lovable....more

Toxic Stress Part 1

 Even when you have all the information about your child's traumatized brain, every bit of therapeutic parenting advice, tons of therapy, and book piles to stop every door in your house, something may still have a stranglehold on your entire family. When it gets right down to it, toxic stress is the real culprit.  Your traumatized child has it and you have it, too....more

My Lesser Parenthood

Number 4 Arrives   ...more

November is National Adoption Month

This week starts the recognition of National Adoption Month. Let me just first begin with some of my history working with adoption.  For two years I have worked with adoptive families, adopted children, foster families and foster children. I have worked in the intense child welfare environment known as child protective services as a permanency planning intern. During my undergrad for social work, I chose this placement because I wanted something completely different than what I really  wanted to do as a social worker (work with veterans)....more
Thanks for the post " adopting a baby is the precious gift of the god"  ...more

Yesterday it felt like the biggest mistake of my life...

We adopted 2 children. They came to us through the foster care system. I championed the process and lead the charge. After having one birth daughter at 37 followed by a rough bout with post-partum depression, it seemed like the clearest choice.No offense but we weren’t going to be one of those couples that only wanted a perfect little white baby fresh from the vagina of a young white trash girl from the mid-west....more

Adoption Pearls from the Oyster of Adoption

 A lesson from nature teaches us that pain is the catalyst that makes the precious pearl. Through all the tough issues adoptees work through in the All-Adoptee ICU, pearls of wisdom are formed. Here is my "take" on the pearls. How about yours?...more

Before You Were Born

Before you were born,God was there bringing you to lifeand saying, “YES” to who you wereand all that you could be.He put His arms around you evenbefore you knew your mother’s touch.He cared for you as no one ever could.He has been your closest friendand constant companion–listening to your cry, enjoyingyour laughter, and encouraging youto follow him. He has never shut youout or made you feel ashamed.He has comforted you and carried your burdens....more
Very uplifting, thanks for sharing!more

Top 10 Star Adoptees With Unique Birth Histories

Adoptees can come from all walks of life and there are even famous adoptees in politics, film, music and other industries that have been able to live a healthy and normal life. In fact, here are the top ten star adoptees all with unique histories and backgrounds that are truly inspiring:1.    Bill Clinton. Believe it or not, Mr. Clinton was actually adopted. He became president of the United States between 1993 and 2001 and now continues to work tirelessly in politics....more
I had read the adoption story of Steven Paul Jobs and very glad that the parents made a good ...more

BlogHer 13: What a Difference a Year Makes!

I'm in Chicago for the BlogHer conference.  I brought my sweet daughter with me.  She also went with me to the New York City conference last year. ...more