When I got back home, I immediately called the guy I was dating, to recount my horrid little tale. He seemed appropriately shocked and amused, so I invited him over.I was still sore from rolling around in an icy alley, so it was nice to get a back rub and have some male attention after visiting the bear den. I had met Scottie a few months earlier, on a free dating site. He was quiet and down to Earth, but mostly… he was really, really good in bed. Which, to be honest, was all I was looking for at the moment....more
Some higher power seems to be pointing out my anal quirks with urgent persistence lately; it’s been hard for me not to notice the things that drive me crazy. I decided it’d be fun to list the few I couldn’t or almost couldn’t help noticing this week and hope you’d also share yours so I don’t feel exceptionally abnormal.
This morning I was putting the lid on my coffee cup in the break room when it struck me: the way it works, the lid opening always has to face what I assume to be the front of the cup or it’s just not right and I cannot drink my coffee....more
So a few weeks ago, I made a terrible error. I was driving my girlfriend and her daughter home. I’d read something funny on the Internet earlier that day that I wanted to tell her about, so I did. Animatedly. Loudly.It was this thing about how Moby wants to make porn about men with average-sized penises. “So then the article is like, “Moby is a man who doesn’t have hair. He doesn’t eat meat, he doesn’t care for furniture. But like all men, he wants to make porn.”...more
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