How Not to Fight: Myths about Fighting In Relationships (And What to Do about Them)

In my counseling practice, couples are often surprised to learn they can communicate and solve problems effectively without fighting; but sometimes you may find it’s not so easy to give up your struggles. You may have trouble letting go of the fighting habit because of two factors: social expectations (expectations the people around you have about marriage) and myths (common beliefs not based on fact.)Myths and Expectations about Fighting ...more

Dear Dr. Romance: I Just Want a Way to Resolve the Yelling

Dear Dr. Romance:I have been together with my wife for about 3 years now. We have worked on many issues in our marriage and resolved most of them; however, there is still one issue that has not been resolved....more

Kids are much cuter after they've gone to bed

I really hate to admit this...but sometimes I dread it when I have to go pick the kids up at school. Bad huh? It's not that I don't miss them. I worry about them when they are not home. I even worry about them when David takes them to go run errands and stuff. I feel like I need to go with him to help protect them. Which is weird because he is extremely capable of taking care of our brood. It's just the lack of control I have when they are not with me. And so I worry....more
They are perfect angels at night! I always find their devilish nature appears at exactly 4 ...more

Win the Battle, Lose the Love

 You throw the credit card bill in the middle of the kitchen table with a victorious flourish. Ta-da! You were right. HE’s the one who maxed out the card. HE’s the one who spent needless dollars on some foolish whats-it that wasn’t in the budget. HE’s the one who puts his selfish needs above the good of the family. HE…well, HE walked out of the room. Fine, who cares. You gloat happily. ...more

If You Liked It Then You Shoulda Put a Ring on It

My blog posts might imply that our family life is always full of love, laughter and laundry. Truth be told, poor Tom will do something that will get on my last possible nerve and I will temporarily lose my mind. (Ironically, this happens around the same time every month.) The meltdown includes loud sighs, eye rolling and rehashing leftover bitterness from 4 months ago. Then I force an apology out of him. If it doesn’t seem sincere enough, I start all over until I deem the Sorry worthy enough to shut me up....more

The Shift

There seems to come a point after you get married when you stop being boyfriend and girlfriend and start being husband and wife. And it's not when you say, "I do." Shortly after we married, everyone would ask A.P. and I if it felt different. "It" being that we were married now, and no longer living in sin. For the most part, I always responded with the joke, "No, it feels like the same boring sh*t." And I meant it, because at the time, it did feel like the same boring sh*t. But now...now it feels different....more

I agree with you completely, Patty. Sadly, I'm an analyzer. It's what I do for a living, and ...more

Trouble in Paradise

A couple of years ago my sister and I started writing occasional features for the Irish Independent newspaper. Most of the pieces are just lighthearted looks about whatever is going on in our lives at the time. But it was one such piece that got her into trouble.It was coming up to Valentine's Day and, if I remember correctly her article was titled 'Thinking of moving in with your boyfriend this Valentines? Well Think Again.' Or something along those lines....more

Motherly Advice

I hold these truths to be self-evident, that all parents and kids are not created equally, but are wholly individual in personality and style....more

Fighting in front of the kids -- do you do it?

I would love to tell you how even-tempered my husband and I are, how we never ever raise our voices.  I'd love to tell you that on the exceedingly rare occasions that we disagree (because really, we never, ever disagree), that one of us just gets a quiet little smile and raises an eyebrow, as a signal to the other that This Is A Topic Better Taken Offline, Where Young Ears Will Not Be Affected By Words of Discontent.  I'd love to say that when it comes to the topic of arguing in front of our daughter, there's really no discussion:  it never happens.I'd love to tell you that, but that would be a Big Fat Hairy Lie....more

Really, I don't have any issues arguing in front of kids.

Ground rules : No name ...more

Do You Fight in Front of Your Kids? I Do. Sort of.

Some parents never fight in front of their kids, and their kids grow up fine. Some parents scream at each other day, and their kids grow up fine. And some in each camp end up with kids who either think a fight means the end of the world or that love is best expressed by yelling and cursing.What's the right thing to do?...more

My husband and I were not even arguing the other day -- we were having a heated political ...more