And So It Begins


Chaos to Action

Last winter, I went to see my counselor feeling very overwhelmed with my surroundings.  I own a 4 bedroom house, 3 1/2 bathrooms, finished basement, kitchen with an island in the middle, and a deck right outside the sliding glass door.  Besides my husband, my daughter, and myself in the home, I also have a small dog, and 3 cats that run around like they own the joint.  My dining room table is cluttered with useful mail encased by the junk.  It get's really overwhelming to look at the pile of papers on a table, that is meant to be eaten on....more

Orchestrating Chaos... An Example

I know I sound absolutely paranoid and borderline insane when I talk about my kids sometimes. I mean, before I learned about Reactive Attachment Disorder, I know I'd have questioned someone's sanity if they'd told me how their extremely young child could manipulate almost anyone and could orchestrate chaos out of thin air.But kids with traumatic histories can do these things! And they do them so well that it is almost awe-inspiring... but it's not, because it's so damn frustrating when you are trying to parent them!...more

A Survival Checklist for the Fraught 20s Decade

If you’ve hit 20, you have entered what might shape up to be the most tumultuous, ambiguous decade you’ve yet to experience. And things only seem to get more confusing/anxiety-inducing with time.At least, that’s the way it was for yours truly.I have a confession to make: I spent my 20s as, hands down, one of the most insecure, unsure, conflicted people you could ever hope to meet.Looking back, I realize that the vast majority of the way my 20s played out was my own doing....more

Big Families Are the Best Thing Ever

Everything was going very well up until 3:00 today. The little two were snuggled in for nap time, Magoo and I were reading The BFG, and TJ was getting set to finish up our work on the basement (so that by the end of the year our goal of having everything finally (FINALLY) organized would be met). ...more
My paternal grandma had 4, maternal grandma 6, my mom had 4. I have 5! :) Love big families, ...more


Hurray! for the blog post that almost wasn't....more


The rain continues to come down.  I continue to venture forth into the Universe to feed myself, for no woman is an island unto herself. She cannot be nurtured and grow without any outside forces.  Within, she will dwindle and wither and become as insignificant as she already feels....more

it's like camping

i keep telling myself it could be worse - we're just without flooring, furniture, and eat breakfast lunch and dinner standing up. i can't find anything and it's so dusty and dirty everywhere. but it really truly could be worse. we are very fortunate - this is nothing i say to my crawling skin....more

My Decade of Baby Is Over

Ten years ago, I was deep into fertility treatments and a busy teaching schedule, settling into a new city far from home, and hoping every single day that I would be pregnant. I was trying to wrap my head around FSH and LH levels and pray that my decision to stay on my seizure medication was the right one....more

A to Z Challenge: On Jumbled Mess

**Even though I haven't cross-posted the last two entries,I am still posting daily for the A to Z challenge.See what you've missed (not much, I've been rather dull lately)here...California Dreamin' SquirrelToday's Post for the Letter J...more