We are not those folks.
Those folks who are divorced and who have kids and who can actually mumble a "hello" to each other and actually mean it.
Those folks who are divorced, remarried and invite each other over to the kids birthday parties.
We are not those folks.
Divorce is one of the most devastating things you could ever put yourself or your family through. The devastating effects and the toll it takes on you and the people closest to you leaves you emotionally, financially, and physically drained and grasping for what your next move should be. In the beginning, starting a new life can seem hopeless-futile. You know you should pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move forward, but most of the time you are left wondering what exactly does forward look like?...more
When I learned you were going to be part of my son’s life, I couldn’t breathe. I expected you to despise me, the ex-wife, in the way so many women do. And I worried you’d see my little boy as a nuisance, someone to be tolerated because he was a reminder of me. Would Connor annoy you when he had a tantrum or needed to be consoled? When he spilled juice, would you be angry? Young children affect vacation plans, dinners, quiet time. Would you grow to resent him the way so many stepmoms do? And would my little boy end-up broken and confused bec...more
image credit: www.steppingthrough.com.auNever underestimate the importance of boundaries.When you don't have them you end up either walking all over the people in your life or getting walked on. Savvy stepfamilies make sure neither of these happens in their homes!...more
Your custody schedule probably contemplated all of the big holidays - but what about the small ones?Today I'm over at DivorcedMoms talking about my issues with scheduling Hallowe'en with the Goblin King!...more
I've been blogging to help me to come to terms with my out of control co-parenting issues. It was supposed to help me to hold my tongue with my ex - because I'd done all of my ranting here. But yesterday, I didn't do that. Yesterday, my daughter got sick at about four in the morning. My ex took her to the hospital because she had a fever and he had no idea what to do....more
I’M ONE OF THOSE "DISNEYLAND DADS" WHO DOESN’T GET TO SEE MY KIDS VERY OFTEN. WHY SHOULD I WASTE OUR PRECIOUS TIME ON HOMEWORK OR CHORES?photocreditDR. RUTHERFORD: I would suspect this may be a common feeling among divorced parents who share custody and don’t see their kids on a daily basis....more
Alright, maybe "want" is putting it a bit strongly. But "need," unfortunately, is an accurate term. Yes, love is love, and yes, parents are parents, and yes, all families are different. But let's get beyond the bumper stickers and look at the hard, cold facts. Legal marriage would put my partner and I in our proper tax bracket when filing together and save our kids oodles of money a year for the college fund. The Human Rights Campaign (HRC) reports (pdf) that the average family of four, including two lesbian parents, will spend tens -- even hundreds -- of thousands of dollars more than identical families with opposite-sex parents raising the children to age 18.
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