Home Alone

Just what I didnt want to happen, has happened. Its amazing the thoughts that can go through your mind when you are left bored and alone. It happened. She was left home alone with her thoughts and thought It'd be a good idea to research her disease. She has every right to know whats going on in her body, after all, it is HER body! I knew the minute something was wrong. The sound of her voice on the phone was too calm, like her mind was elsewhere. In fact, it was. It was racing with thoughts of sickness, time, family and death. ...more

Kickoff To Chemo

Who ever thought that just 1 day can change your life forever? Since the surgery, there has been a tremendous outpouring of love and support from people you never knew cared so much. There's been casseroles, cards, gifts and so much more. Neighbors who you once just waived hello to in passing have come over and spent time talking, extending words of encouragement and showing their support. The warm feeling I get knowing my mom is so loved overwhelms me with emotion. I don't know how I will ever thank them all. It sounds so cliche but the saying holds true....more

The beginning... Not Just A Headache.

In 2010, My mother was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer. I needed a way to get my feelings out  so I decided blogging would be the best way. I wanted to share my thoughts and feelings in the hopes that someone out there understood what I was going through. Its been nearly 3 years since I stopped blogging about it and my mother has since had a recurrence. This, is where it all began. ...more

What is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Anyway?

You can find serenity in learning that even if you do have a problem, there is always a solution. When a person experiences a serious, traumatic event, she should be prepared to have many people tell her that she that  she will suffer from post traumatic stress syndrome.  When two of my children and I were struck by a hit and run truck driver recently my husband joined the chorus of people telling me to watch out and that I was suffering from PTSD aka post traumatic stress disorder....more

PAIN AFTER A SURGERY, THREE MONTHS LATER. THE HUMAN BAROMETER!

SEVERAL years ago I shattered the end of my ulna and destroyed the cartlidge in my wrist.  I lost most of my motion in my wrist at that point.  Recently actually February 12, 2013 my wrist was totally fused.  ...more
THE ROUGH DAY CONTINUES......FEELING A LITTLE UN PRODUCTIVE.more

Wanna Be Happy? Practice!

If ever there was a miserable day, this is it: your six year old threw a tantrum because her favorite socks have a hole in them, your SO forgot about an early meeting, so you had to take the kids to school rushing all the way, hair still damp from your shower because who had time to dry it, much less style it you got a ticket for speeding, so now you’re late to work. ...more

I'm Prone to Throwing Things

This weekend I patched up holes in my son's room. I had mixed emotions while I was applying Drydex to each indent or scrape: anger and another level of anger somewhere hovering around rage. I usually don't go in his room very often because of the general sense of irritation, horror, and the desire to set it on fire that accompanies each visit. ...more

Keep Your Head When...

A little over five years ago I was writing about reckoning heartbreak, as a moment in time refused to be ignored and I had to reevaluate what I was doing as a parent. The decisions I was making in the interest of having it all were taking a toll on all of us in ways that just weren’t worth the effort....more

I Can Laugh in the Face of Tragedy

 The Joy of Mothering  Credit: iamthatgirl.com ...more
do you laugh as a coping mechanismmore

Son Of A......$#@%^

For those of you who read The Grief 365 Badge, this is the unexpected 4am follow up.  For those of you just tuning in, go and do your homework. Just kidding! My family will not be together this Thanksgiving Day.  My father had to work, my brother will go to his in laws house, my family has flown south with my in laws, to Florida to escape, and my mother will be having the time of her life spending Thanksgiving in heaven.  ...more