Don't Snore on the First Date

 Middle-age women often ask me for advice about dating after age 50. I tell them to note my three non-negotiable nuggets of knowledge before baring their souls and body parts: Do Keep a Positive Attitude, Don’t Settle, and Don’t Snore on the First Date....more

Dating Multiple People - Part of My Tinder Story

Ask any dating expert, as in real “experts” other than me, because you should not be here for advice, they will say the key to successfully dating online and potentially meeting your match is to compare and contrast multiple people in real time by pitting them against each other to gage what you like and what you don't, versus what qualities are important against those that aren't. This is fact, however, just because I've stated it does not mean I'm either for or against this concept, not am I convinced that this type of dating works....more

What I learned from going on 30 dates in 30 consecutive nights

30 Tinder Dates in 30 Nights“I think it’s a great idea,” said my mom when I told her my plan to go on 30 dates in 30 nights. “Really?” I replied. It wasn’t the reaction I expected from her. My friends and the rest of my family were very supportive about it also. Except my grandmother, she was very worried I might meet the wrong kind of man. Ohhh grandma… don’t you know that’s what I’ve been doing for the past 15 years???...more

Why I Call It the Goose and Gander Conundrum.

Life went on after Mr. Fruit Plate and I went on more first dates, none of which took for months. In fact, it began to feel more like a job search gone bad than a merry romp through fields of potential long term mates. I began to despair and wonder if I was really cut out for this online human crap shoot. ...more

Your Place or Mine

I was watching The Mindy Project recently. The episode when Mindy and Danny are still awkwardly working out their new relationship kinks and Danny didn’t want Mindy leaving her personal items at his apartment. Mindy tried everything she could to hide her things there so she wasn’t stuck lugging her crap back and forth every day. Of course I laughed because it was funny but then I got to thinking… I couldn’t relate. ...more

Middle-Age Coffee-Safe Date

You’ve moved on, you’ve learned some lessons, you’re ready to start dating again.Email correspondence, mandatory two weeks, just to establish that he can put a real thought on paper. Spelling, check; punctuation, check. Other: has a job, no children under high school age, has interests other than on-line dating; check.Walk and a Coffee, Saturday morning.I’m the first one to arrive, bad sign, call me old fashioned. He enters, oh-oh, the photo was obviously 5-10 years old....more

"Dude: You Are Not Your Fruit Plate", said the Zombie.

This is what I wanted to say to the American chef after almost five fucking hours of an interminable first date. FIVE HOURS. I wasn’t physically attracted to him or his personality. At. All....more

Tinder Tumble: Six Date Stumble

I know...I know. Not another essay, article or story detailing yet another beckoning booty-call that evidently occurred on the infamous app that is Tinder. “Hey Baby...Hey Sugar...Heeeeyyyy?!"...more

#WhyILeft: I Have My Voice Back

I didn't understand that I was in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship until I received the following texts last night. And then it all clicked. ...more

Self Esteem and Your Dating Life

So here I am in the present again. I just passed the first YEAR anni of being on POF and tomorrow it’s again a year to the day I met BMX so this week has been rife with sentiment and revelations and memories - all kinds of good shit. Sigh. And what’s an anniversary without a pity party, on the phone sobbing: “I'm gonna to die alone, Allison!!”? Yeah. Break out the champagne, girlies. It was THAT much fun....more