Smacking works great!

I know that I am probably going to get shouted down but here goes - Modern parenting doesn't work!  I fell for all the modern theories and raised my first child by the rules.  I was a textbook modern parent.  So I had to ask myself when she was about 10, why was I so frazzled and frustrated? Why was she not getting the rules? Why was I still teaching the same lessons over and over?! Why did she think she could argue with every decision?...more

I definitely have not mastered modern parenting.  I'm never sure how to respond to ...more

That's It--I'm taking away the Atlas!

Have you ever threatened to take away a book in the heat of disciplining your child? I have. Just last week, I told my son that if he didn’t start behaving at school, I was going to take away his National Geographic 2009 World Atlas. This was big stuff—he knew I must be serious if I was threatening to withhold his atlas. You probably think I’m joking. I wish. My boy has a passion for books, an unslakeable thirst for knowledge, and an inexplicably accurate and detailed memory....more

I giggle at the 'towel trick'!  You probably had a problem with flashlights, ...more

Parents Just Don't Understand

The other day I got an email from the school district calling for an urgent meeting:11/07/09 Subject: VHS Dance Discussion All Welcome to Attend...more

Ahem****not to be trite***** but have they actually seen salsa??  Holy cow.....salsa ...more

It Takes a Village to Create a Monster

My kindergartener Mali has become openly rude and defiant. To me, to other parents, to teachers, to other children. It's not just upsetting, it's horrifying. I blame you. ...more

I'm glad my blog post resonated with you; I think you make an excellent point in ...more

Why Is Yelling a Parental Hot Button?

We've seen the harried mother in Wal-Mart, shrieking at her wayward toddler as she streaks through the aisles clutching candy. You've probably also been the exhausted mommy who, at the end of a long day, MUST YELL TO GET THE SELECTIVELY HEARING-IMPAIRED CHILD TO TAKE A BATH.I myself went along a parenting trajectory. It went like this:New mommy: Cooing and singing, even when my daughter popped me in the nose accidentally while reaching for a toy, hurting me so bad my eyes watered Toddler mommy: Redirection! These tantrums are developmentally appropriate! Ha!Preschooler mommy: I don't understand you when you use that whining voice.Kindergartner mommy: Yell ...more

I gererally feel like a heel after, too.  My three year old does.not.listen.  I ...more

Standing up for time outs

So, has anybody else out there read that timeouts are the new spankings--i.e., totally ineffective and potentially damaging?Apparently, by denying our children affection for a couple of minutes after they break the rules--generally set to prevent kids from experiencing or causing others physical harm--we're subjecting them to conditional love....more

I wasted most of the alone time I had during my first pregnancy reading about the pregnancy ...more


There can be few things so embarrassing or troubling in a parent's life as being called into the Principal's office. If you thought it was bad as a kid, it's nothing like being the so-called adult in the relationship and still not getting it right....more

To spank or not to spank? Study says early spankings make for aggressive toddlers

A new study of 2,500 white, Mexican American and black children from low-income families suggests that early spankings make for aggressive toddlers. According to the study, which is published in the journal Child Development, "Children who are spanked as 1-year-olds are more likely to behave aggressively and perform worse on cognitive tests as toddlers than children who are spared the punishment, new research shows." ...more

I have a huge problem with the quoted study "2500 low income 1 yr olds". First, why does a 1 yr ...more

Disciplining Kids: It's All About The Calmness

Any mom knows that disciplining kids can be hard. I’ll never forget when my daughter, about two-and-a-half at the time, had a full-blown temper tantrum in Target. Up to that point, I thought my husband and I were doing a pretty good job with discipline. I'm embarrassed to admit I never thought my child would prostrate herself on the floor in the middle of a store, kicking and screaming. Boy, was I humbled. ...more

Discipline and Co-parenting

Disciplining children can be hard enough as it is in a traditional family.  But add divorce, joint custody and getting remarried to the equation and it makes it even more difficult. The girl’s father was very lazy, nothing bothered him and it took pulling teeth and ultimatums to get him to lift a finger.  Now I’m in a relationship that is quite the opposite:  Frank does things way before I even need to ask.  The problem with this type of personality though is that he is ‘Johnny on the Spot’ when it comes to my girls and the proper discipline. ...more