Give and you shall not receive

I met with a mentor of mine recently to talk about work: my goals, challenges, aspirations, etc. Even though I love my job, it’s still the area of my life where I feel the most insecurity. However, my mentor threw me for a loop when he offered his advice:“It’s not really your job where you need help. That’s where you think you need help because it’s the most obvious to you. But what about your husband? Your family? Your friendships?”...more

Why Playing Small Is Just Your Ego

When most of us think of the idea of the ego, we think of words like “egotistical” or “arrogant.” What most don’t understand is that the same ego that leads people to boast,  self-inflate, name drop, and preen around with self importance can manifest as just the opposite.  When you wallow in self-doubt, act like you’re not good enough to belong, self-flagellate, or otherwise diminish yourself, that’s not humility. It’s more ego....more

The Ego of Parenting: Sometimes Yelling Works

They are making childhood memories. I’m in the moment, I’m present. My ego role playing is temporarily out of order. I’m interacting with my girls by creating memories for them. Then it’s bed time. I’m certain I’ve worn them out. They’ll go right to sleep all happy and blissful and in love with life. I lie down with them, hug them, even play Treasure Hunt on their backs and recount all the fun we had that day. This parenting without role playing is really working out for me. It’s so easy. Until I walk away from their bedroom....more
@Frantic Mama Thanks! I don't know how not to be honest. Something I still need to learn: Being ...more

You’ve Already Arrived, Darling

You are enough.There. I said it. Breathe that in.You are enough.I can already hear your “Yeah, but’s.”Yeah, but I could be thinner.Yeah, but I haven’t graduated from law school yet.Yeah, but I haven’t figured out my life purpose.Yeah, but I’ve always wanted to write a book.Yeah, but I’m not making as much money as I want to make.Yeah, but… bullshit....more

The Inner Path: No To The Ego

“The moment you become aware of the ego in you, it is strictly speaking no longer the ego, but just an old, conditioned mind-pattern. Ego implies unawareness. Awareness and ego cannot coexist.” ― Eckhart Tolle  The ego is a powerful thing. So many people have been snared by this conceptual element and don't even know it. The ego disguises itself as... you.  A conception your identity in a physical form.  Elements of the outside world and of personal experiences are mostly repressed by the ego... that's a problem.  The ego comes out as your character for all to see, not always seen asan overinflated sense of self.  It canturn up in feelings of inferiority or self-hatred also, because ego is any image you have of yourself that gives you a sense of identity.   That identity derives from the things you tell yourself and the things other people have been saying about you that you've decided to accept as truth. Yes, and that's why it's important for you to let go of the ego and be you. The ego is a protective and guarded shell for you, not protecting you, but separating you.  It's a barrier, cutting you off from other people and the outside world.  Separating you... from you.  ...more

Stalking the Elusive Ego in the Wild!

I believe that the ego is basically the same as our "rational" mind, or our "human" mind, whereas our intuition is the voice of our "higher self" or "God-self." Understanding our own true essence, unconditional love, is death to the ego. The ego is all about "I", so when you finally understand that we are all LOVE, all ONE, that there is no "I", the ego ceases to exist or have function. So naturally, it is very invested in keeping us feeling fearful, guilty, ashamed and separate....more

He’s Just Not That Into You

You know how the inner dialogue goes. I certainly do. My twenty-something years are full of journal entries scribbling it out. My ping-pong dialogue looked something like this, and I suspect yours sounds pretty dang similar:He loves me. He must love me. I can tell he really loves me. But then why is he pulling away from me like I suddenly have the cooties? Is it because I came on too strong? Am I too much? Too intense? Too passionate? Too threatening? Too successful? ...more