My oldest daughter, who loves holidays, came home from school and told me she wants an Elf on the Shelf."What's that?" I asked. "It's this doll who comes to life at night and causes mischief!"I stopped putting away groceries. "You mean Chucky?" "No!" she exclaimed.The traumatized preteen inside me who should never have seen Child's Play at the mall breathed a sigh of relief. I put away a box of macaroni. "So, what kind of mischief does this elf thing cause?"...more
Dear Elf on the Shelf Parents,
Good job, you!
First and foremost, congrats on setting yourself up for a month of craziness. I appreciate that you love your child(ren) so much that you've given them a crazy-looking elvish creature to look for every morning in the hopes of keeping them well-behaved before Christmas. Whatever works, right?
I found a note on my pillow this morning from my Elf on a Shelf. Excuse all the bad puns, I didn't write it:
I’m not sure how to put this, so I guess I'll just come right out and say it: Could you please kick it up a notch with this “Elf on a Shelf” ritual?
You see, every night I fly back up to the North Pole to see Santa, along with all the other Elves on Shelves, and all I hear about from the other elves is what a great time they are having at their homes.
I'm not happy about this post. I love mocking ridiculous things, but I feel most comfortable poking fun at stuff I like. Things like my college football team, my kids' quirks, my brother's ability to get free stuff from anyone he meets, and how my mom identifies herself by name when she leaves me a message. "Oh, hi Amy. This is your mom. Susan."
My favorite target is myself. But today I turn my disdain outward, to a society that complains about consumerism and too many commitments, but spends $30 dollars for the privilege of managing the "magic" of a cheaply made stuffed elf during the busiest month of the year....more
Dear Elfy –Next week you’ll be coming back to our house until Christmas, and I’ve got to admit, I’m kind of looking forward to seeing you again.Sure, you’re a little creepy: I never walk with my back to you in a dark room, and you remind me of the Fantasy Island episode where the ventriloquist dummy comes to life to kill its owner until it’s burned alive....more
Since I’m too cheap to buy the real elf on the shelf, we use three little elves that were already somehow in our Christmas decorations last year instead (maybe gift tags from two years ago? Who knows?) Anyway, they did pretty good coming up with mischievous things last year, but this holiday season? Not so much. These elves are so lazy that they keep forgetting to get up to mischief at night....more
Each year, the first week of December drops a giant pile of guilt square in my lap. My Facebook news feed fills up with all of my other parent friends posting pictures of all of the creative and often naughty things that their elf (or elves) have done the night before. "Oh, my kids are going to love this!", they exclaim. My Pinterest announcements are overflowing with all of the pins of silly or devious elves. We are a non-elf family. Each year, I question, "Maybe, we should get an elf (or three)....more
From elfontheshelf.com: "The Elf on the Shelf® is a special scout elf sent from the North Pole to help Santa Claus manage his naughty and nice lists. When a family adopts an elf and gives it a name, the elf receives its Christmas magic and can fly to the North Pole each night to tell Santa Claus about all of the day's adventures. Each morning, the elf returns to its family and perches in a different place to watch the fun. Children love to wake up and race around the house looking for their elf each morning."...more