Parks in the Summertime

Summer is in full swing, and, living in Florida, the temperatures are getting awful hot.  Still, indoor amusements only last for so long before you need to get your kids out of the house or lose your mind.   As the sun swelters overhead, gone are the days of packing everyone in the car on a moment’s notice and heading to the nearest outdoor adventure....more

How to Remove your Kids from your Ankles

As I've mentioned before, my kids are clingers. I did this to myself, and I did this to them, unthinkingly, when we moved here. We didn't know anyone, I didn't have a car, blahblah excuses. Regardless, because of my choices, my kids spent an entire year no farther from mommy than about 10 feet at any given time.I didn't realize what I had done until I went on a job interview a few hours away and left them with a babysitter without warning....more

Moment of the Week - 40

 My babies lose an argument to inanimate objects.

How to be the Sexiest Piece of Ass at your Local Tot Gym

Monika Whitney, over at, was a lot like me as a single person...only with more grace and style, trust me. She agreed to teach me how to be the hottest mom at the Tot Gym and maybe even be a little friendlier, too. Go check her out!...more

Ditch the Kids' Menu

When the babies first started eating real food, we were so excited about the kids' menus at restaurants.  Look at all these shiny options! And they come with a snack and drink? And they're only $4 to $7?  Sign us up!  We'll take the chicken nuggets, no, the hotdogs, no, wait, we'll take the macaroni and cheese.Our glee slowly faded, though, when we realized that the $7-dollar meal would never be eaten....more

Take a Hike

For the first six months we lived here, we were a one-car family, meaning that if I had to go grocery shopping or do errands, we'd all get up early, pile in the car, drop my husband off at work, and go about our business.  Then we'd go pick him up in the evening.  It was inconvenient, so whenever I could, I avoided it.  We did a lot of walking.Thankfully, living in Florida, I was able to take them out far into the "colder" months.  Of course, I soon learned that "passing showers" in this state actually meant torrential downpours in which drops the size of buckets...more

Wait a Month (or Two or Three)

Most parents of toddlers have had at least one outing of complete misery for all involved. A day that was planned and supposed to be fun that just went completely off the rails.For us, that day was a few months ago....more

Separation Anxiety

I had to go to the doctor this morning.  A regular check up....more

Party Like a Momstar

Yesterday was my friend's birthday.  As we sat around a plastic corner table underneath the harsh fluorescent lighting, Happy Meals strewn about, amid shouts about apple juice ownership (no, you can't have all three juice boxes) and arguments over whether or not the barbecue sauce in itself was enough food for lunch (what if it's licked off the McNuggets, Mom, does that count?), it had never been more drastically clear how much life has changed.This was a birthday party?  Not to s...more

Grocery Game-plan

 Grocery shopping is always a crap shoot over here.  The babies know they have me captive because when we go to the grocery store, we have things we need to get before we leave. They know I won't leave until I go through the checkout....more