Teaching Our Kids Independence - Then Having Them Teaching It Back to Us!

Today, my daughter returned a present to me which I had given her years ago, when she was really little.I have been visiting her in Brazil, for the last week and for several reasons, until today, she had not wanted to leave my side for more than a minute. Part of it was the sweetness of being together again and part of it was a newly grown protective streak....more

Did I Give Up Everything Wonderful and Pretty to Become a Mom?

A birth control commercial currently showing on tv depicts a handful of young, attractive women entering what appears to be a store of dreams. Everything is in miniature – here is a beautiful house, there is a trip to Paris. Two women even grab for the same good-looking guy. But when a stork carrying a little bundle of joy approaches one of the women, she shoos it away, quickening her step to avoid impending motherhood. Honestly, I think I see just the slightest wave of terror cross her face. ...more
Great post!  My favorite line, "this motherhood thing- it's not easy -it's a fine balance ...more

Alone Again, (Un)Naturally

A.P. is out of town until Friday night. (He's on business in Las Vegas. I get Kansas, he gets Las Vegas. Ah, well, whatdya gonna do?) He left early this morning. I was so, so sad to see him go. I pick on him a lot. I demand a lot from him. I know I'm not a piece of cake, but I love him. It's times like these I know for sure. He woke me up to say good-bye, and I actually got up on my knees and gave him a big, tight hug and kissed him good-bye....more

The Best Laid Plans

We all have visions of what our children will be like. I've always been a staunch believer in nurture over nature, and I've had visions of weekend soccer games and ponytails, of my sporty, tomboy daughter laughing together with her group of sporty, tomboy friends for well, for as long as I've been envisioning having a daughter. I cringed at the cheerleaders and dance team girls in high school. I felt appalled at the flighty college sorority girls, at girls who couldn't be seen without makeup and hair just so....more

We, too, tried not to over pink our daughter. we asked for clothes that weren't "too girly", ...more

Another Step Towards Independence

Today marked another “mini-milestone” in my eldest son’s life. He is currently in Grade 1 and was invited to attend a friend’s birthday party (a Lego party which he was very excited about). Well, after a bit of discussion between my husband and me we decided it was time for our son to attend parties on his own. We would drop him off and pick him up. It was a two-hour party and just around the corner from our house. We have met the birthday boy’s parents, and the mom assured me parents of the invitees did not need to stay....more

Thanks so much for your comment. I agree it doesn't get easier. It's nice to share these ...more

Would You Let Your Six-Year-Old Walk Home Alone?

Each time she has asked me this question (every day, for the past 14 days, multiple times each day OMG) my answer has been, "no." And her response has always been, "but why not?" And my response is always, "because you're too young." And her response has always been, "but I know that I need to stay on the side of the road and watch for cars and not to get in a stranger's car!" ...more
Good grief, there is a lot of horror stories going on in this thread! To start with, you're not ...more

This time? I need a simple mattress...

"This time? I need simple" I thought as I walked down the aisles of the mattress collection."This time? I need easy" I thought now in store #2, sampling the offerings. Store #1 overwhelmed me. "This time? I want to just look for the bed for the now," I heard my heart defend. (That internal motherly wise self always knows when you just need that honey, it's for the right now"). I'd finally opted out of the mattress specialty stores #1 & #2 and found my way to practical: store #3: Sears....more

Breaking Up is a Restraining Order Away

Since when did it take a restraining order to break up? I happened to mention how hard it is to get a temporary restraining order against someone and someone else said that this is the only way to break up these days. What! Then last night, I took a friend home from dinner and a movie and found an old car and a young boyfriend in her driveway, uninvited and unwelcome (just the boyfriend – the car could stay!)....more

Autonomous People Make The Best Lovers

  The moment narcissistic and emotionally clouded, Jerry Maguire uttered the words, “You complete me,” women and men swooned at the notion that love and self were fully realized when two fated-lovers decided they couldn’t live without each other.  Though before the human head weighed eight pounds, both fiction and real life idolized this concept. The act of abandoning ourselves to another feels so powerful that, for centuries, we have mistaken this experience as the most desirable form of love. However, this love is inevitably unsustainable,personal humanity needs growth and no growth can occur in the shadow of another.   ...more

Float Like a Butterfly

The scene: Alex is in desperate need of a nap. We lay in bed to feed him. His eyes are opening and closing in a drowsy manner.Enter bed left: Daddy.Daddy: "Oh, are you going to sleep buddy? Why don't we all take a nap together?"Daddy lays down and proceeds to snuggle with the babe. He tries to put his arm around Alex's stomach.Smack!Alex blocks this attempt at snuggling. Daddy tries a different angle. Smack! And another angle....Smack! The boy continues to block off any unwanted snuggling....more