Blessed Are the Merciful: Showing Mercy to Parents Who Need It

I didn't write anything about how awful people were when the little boy fell into the gorilla enclosure.  I didn't say anything about how quick people were to judge the poor parents whose child was killed by the alligator....more

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Inspiritual: A space for spiritual evolution and transformation...more

Ban Bossy? Ban Overachiever

There is a part of every conversation I have with someone new that I dread. It goes a little something like this:"Tell me about yourself.""Well, I recently graduated from Stanford."One eyebrow raises. "Oh, what was your major?""Do I look that young? Um, well, I graduated from law school and I got a PhD."Both eyebrows raise. "Wow. A bit of an overachiever are we?" Nervous laughter.Then I drop the bomb. "Really? But I hadn't even told you that I have three kids."And brains explode and heads shake. And judgment crashes down....more

Wilted: The Power of a Mother's Criticism

My mother scolded me on the phone one night for leaving my eight-year old daughter alone while I went to the store and I didn't talk to her for months. I felt the scorch of her judgment in every part of my body. It made me sick, angry, indignant, sorrowful, shamed....more

Accepting Where You Are

“Now that I am trying to change, I don’t like who I am.”At some point, many of my clients say this or something similar. When they finally see a new way to be, but are not yet capable of acting that way, they begin to attack themselves.“I am a horrible person.”“Being this way is bad.”“It is wrong to act like this.”...more

There Is No Dress Code For Motherhood

In the past two weeks, I’ve seen several articles floating around the internet about not dressing like a “mom”. It’s eye roll worthy for its judgment passed off as “helpful” advice....more

Hey Man, Don't Judge

By now you may have picked up on the fact that, in my head, I hear certain things in particular voices. I think I am a fairly auditory person. I can hear the words to a song three times and know all of it’s lyrics well enough that I can sing along with perfect mimicry of intonation and flourish… but only if the music is playing at the same time. Otherwise I hear bits and pieces. When I read something, I can hear the author or character’s voice if I have heard it three or more times before. Jokes, movie lines, and other such tidbits are all things that I hear in certain voices....more

Rainy Days and Mondays

This is not going to be a “fun” post. I’m sorry. Today is one of those days that I feel sad. These are the days that I really have to practice being happy. As I’ve said, though, happiness doesn’t really happen when you try to ignore your less-than-happy emotions. I have good days and bad days. I think that is true of most people. I’m not really sure how to say the things that I want to say today. It feels like there is a lot, and I don’t know where to start. I apologize if I end up rambling. I am, in general, a fairly private person....more

Mom on Mom Judgement

I cannot be the only one…who has noticed that some Mamas thrive on schooling you on what is good parenting. There are those Moms who I think are just waiting for a good moment to drop some superior mothering wisdom on you and the others who are all about passing parenting judgment, either way this schooling happens to me quite often....more

Please Don't Call Me a Supermom

When I tell people I've gone to the store, or out to eat, or made dinner, or gotten a few hours of work done, or some other apparently monumental task while being responsible for all four of my kids, I get exclamations of amazement. "You're a supermom!", they'll say. Or, "I only have two, and I can barely manage most nights!" Or, "I don't know how you do it!" I know these are meant as compliments and are honest reactions to something outside their own frame of reference. And I appreciate them as such....more
So True!  We all do our best.  Some of us do things I wish I could.  Others of us don't do ...more
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