A Dad's Perspective on Miscarriage

I get asked quite often why there is a big age gap between kids 2 and 3. There is a 5 and a half year’s difference and people seem to be curious as to why we began our journey through babyhood once again. When I’m asked, I usually smile and say simply, “timing was right.” I don’t mind the question and it is simply a way for parents to keep a conversation going. But the truth is, there wasn’t supposed to be such a big gap…...more

miscarriageCARE: 15 Emotions Those Who Miscarry May Feel

What does a woman feel when she miscarries? ...more


I got that phone call yesterday we had been waiting on for almost 6 weeks.  The OB's office had received our chromosomal testing back from the baby.  I had been waiting on and dreading this moment since the day we found out the baby had passed away....more
So very sorry for your loss.  I love the name you choose.  It's beautiful and I hope that naming ...more

5 Things I Didn't Know About Miscarriages Until I Had One

  We have had 4 “first” ultrasounds. Three of which ended with the nurse calling the doctor in to meet with us. I have never really talked about the third one. To anyone. It was probably the most painful, hopeless, and helpless ultrasound I’ve had.   ...more

Ending the Silent First Trimester

About a week before Christmas, I had a weird encounter.  One afternoon as I sat on the couch, my four year old came up to me, cupped her hands around her mouth, bent down by my stomach and said "Hello!  Is anybody in there?!" then giggled and ran away.At the time I thought it was strange, but she is my silly one.  As it turns out, though, it wasn't just a silly moment.  There IS somebody in there....more

When You Meet Someone Who Also Lost a Twin Daughter

I recently became friends with a mother on my daughter’s cheerleading squad. There was an instant affinity between us, though we had little enough in common. She’s the mother of five; I have two. She works full time; I stay at home. She has an au pair (a real one, from a foreign country and everything); I don’t even know a neighborhood kid that I could call to babysit. But we bonded anyway, over the shrill yells, mistimed choreography, and the joy of watching our daughters be a part of a team. And one day, we bonded over something else. ...more
sunnysideshlee Thank for your kind words. I appreciate it.more

My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.

This Thanksgiving was supposed to be the day that we announced our joy to the world, that what we were most thankful for this year was the new addition soon to be added to our family. But God had other plans. Instead, on Wednesday, at 11 weeks and 1 day of my pregnancy, we rushed to the emergency room with light bleeding. A few hours later, we learned that our baby measured at just 9 weeks and had no heartbeat. In moments, I went from being an anxious young mother preparing to meet my first child to a heartbroken young mother, experiencing the loss of my first child....more

The Child We Never Held

On October 15 of every year, besides the usual scramble to get my taxes in on the extension deadline, I take time to remember and think about our first child – a baby I loved more than I ever thought possible despite never holding him or her in my arms or carrying him or her full term. For those who might not know, October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day....more

I Lost My Baby, Too

 Our first baby would have turned 14 this month.And every year around this time,a tiny shudder will run through me when I step into a bathroom.It will always be a room where I first said hello and good bye to motherhood. I can still see the colour of the walls.I can still see the lines on a stick....more

My Miscarriage: What I Know and What I Don’t

Women never forget a miscarried child. Even now 18 years later I wonder how life might have been different if my little girl “Vayle” had survived beyond the 16 weeks we traveled together.My husband and I have 5 boys between us. What would it have been like to have another female in the house to share hurt feelings with or to fight with over missing socks?...more