The Other Taboo of Miscarriage: I Was Grateful

About a year and a half ago, I had a miscarriage. ...more
"But you know what? It was MY miscarriage -- MY experience. And what I feel about it is MINE. ...more

Saying Goodbye to #2

This isn't how I hoped things would turn out. We didn't get our miracle. Yesterday, we said goodbye to Baby #2.I was hopeful. I really was. Not perfectly faith-filled, but I prayed and believed God could do this. And I was asking Him to.  But things didn't turn out that way....more

The Bleeding Red Dress

One Halloween two years ago I was sad. Not ‘regular sad’ as Four Year Old would put it, but broken and shattered sad. In what was probably a subconscious attempt to fake it until you make it, I’ve decided I may as well look good. Defiantly I put on my bleeding red dress, a short dark wig, a pair of heels and some fake lashes and rode the subway to work as Betty Boop. The only one in costume, hiding two secrets behind it. How I really look and how I really feel....more

How I Am Surviving This Week

Not that any week when you are dealing with infertility, TTC, or an uncertain pregnancy is easy, but this week has been another challenging week to get through. This is almost starting to feel normal to me: the agonizing wait....more

Infertile Women are Not Out to Kill Your Baby

The story of Angela Maier struck fear in the hearts of pregnant women everywhere this weekend.  Over three years ago, in deep grief after experiencing three miscarriages, she poisoned both her pregnant sister-in-law and friend, causing them to lose their pregnancies. She recently confessed to the crime stating that she couldn't fathom watching their children grow up while hers were dead. The two women are currently pregnant again, hence the timing of the confession, and Maier has a three-year-old child. ...more
Melissa,   Thank you for this. I couldn't agree more. I started trying much later in life as my ...more

On Faith, Prayer and Miracles

In any unoccupied moment this weekend, I have been having a running dialogue with God/monologue with myself over this whole pending miscarriage situation. Trying to make some sense. Trying to come to a bottom line where I can find peace.It's not really coming easily to me....more

My Long and Winding Road to Motherood

My Long and Winding Road to Motherhood  ...more

Me vs. Infertility, Round 4. Winner: To Be Determined

I've struggled with this post - what to say, when to say it, how much to say.  I've been putting it off, waiting for something concrete, certain, specific, before I went public....more
inkscrblr my prayers are with you. God bless you in this journey.more

What Nobody Tells You About Miscarriages

When miscarriage strikes, nobody hands you a fact-sheet with what to expect in the aftermath.   It certainly would have helped....more

Buckets of Hope - Surviving Multiple Miscarriages

This week, I had my third miscarriage. According to the numbers, 1-2% of women will experience 3 or more miscarriages. Not really something I would have chosen to be an overachiever on, if I’d been the one making the decision.It’s a truly humbling experience, and the grieving is exhausting. I go back and forth between being numb, then jealous of others who seem to get pregnant at the drop of a hat, then angry, then feeling more than a little sorry for myself, then numbness again.  Not pretty emotions to contend with. It’s embarrassing. ...more
@ahundredaffections Thank you so much :) I did a bunch of research on Friday about becoming a ...more