Crushing my Mom Doubt with Some Tea and Buddha

I’ve always felt pretty confident about the decisions I make as a parent — until recently as I try to navigate the hormones of two nearly ten-year old girls. In order to get through these trying days I’ve used a combination of the Serenity prayer, girl friend support, parenting books and Kendall Jackson chardonnay.But deeper than my exhaustion from the fights, exasperated comments, and eye-rolls, is the constant shadow of self-doubt that is creeping into my world on a regular basis....more

You're Not Alone VIII

I’m not saying these are all about me. I’m just saying if you feel the same, or you have done it too, you’re not alone.You’re not alone if……when you try to use your DVD or TV, you have to say the steps OUT LOUD because there is a lot to do and it is very confusing.…you stop in the middle of exercising to get a snack....more

The Perfect Mom

The mother of today is supposed to be a nonstop nurturer that lives and breathes the happiness of her children, involve them in a plethora of extracurricular activities and chauffeur them back and forth to said activities, keep her home flawlessly clean, look ageless and refreshed, all the while presenting a relaxed and satisfied image to her family, friends, and community. And if you believe everything that you read on Facebook, or see out in public, the world is bursting at its seams with Perfect Mothers....more

I've Been a Mom for 10 Years

I've had a hard time sleeping for a few nights.  Go figure....but something occurred to me, in my "no shutdown brain":I have been a mom for 10 years.10 years.  10.  5+5.  Double digits.  10.10 years - 3 years a mother of 1 and next 7 years a mother of 2 redheaded boys....more

Mom's "Diagnosis"

I often joke that,"Mom and I were inseparable for the first nine months--then we went our separate ways." She'd drift in and out of my life from time to time but she was never more than a familiar stranger to me. She'd given me to her mother to raise because I was 'in the way' and has always contended that I 'got the life she would've gotten' had I not come along.  Now that Mom is in her late seventies, she has decided I'm to take care of her simply because I'm 'her daughter.' I do not trust her....more

The sleep.

One day, when I was in high school,I grew tired and went to bed. I slept eighteen hours or more a day.I lost a year of school. Medical tests proved nothing.Almost a year later,I was rested.  I wrote this at that time; ‘I was so down.No matter what the doctors said,I knew there was something wrong.Week after week – I slept them away. I missed my friends.I missed myself.I didn’t like this new me.And if you had seen me,...more
Life Breath Present Thank you!  Appreciated very much!more

The neighbourhood.

Mrs. B always gave us apple juice.She was strange.  So was her daughter.   Mrs. R wore a lot of make-up.She was fussy.  I was always worried I would make a mess when I was there.Consequently, I spilled a drink nearly every visit....more
I lived on a dead end street with 9 houses when I grew up- this is becoming strange indeed ...more

The need for praise.

I was shy when I was young.I remember the feeling I would get when called out.I was very quiet.  I didn’t have to be taught stranger danger! I was also considered oddly well behaved.I knew that on some level....more
well now, looks like we are cut from the same cloth. I mainly write about my kids but this post ...more

The planning.

Mom and I spent most days together that summer.I had just graduated from University.I was engaged to be married in the fall.Life was full of happy plans. I chose a black and white theme....more