Tiger Mom vs. Western Mom

 A Chinese client asked me what I think of Tiger Mom parenting (extremely strict and demanding of excellence).  She was trying to follow that method of parenting and it wasn't working, to say the least.I can see pros and cons to all parenting styles.  Here are some of my own personal observations.Chinese Parenting:Pros:...more

A Letter to the Father of Hannah Who Posted “To My Parents” on Facebook

Dear father of Hannah: I watched the video you posted for others to see and thought about you, your wife and Hannah today. I talked to some friends about your struggle and I read a couple of newspaper articles covering the “news” of your video getting widespread attention. I would imagine that things are really weird around your house right now. You’re probably getting quite a few media calls, Hannah is probably getting quite a few media calls too, and I would imagine that your life changed more than you could have imagined since last night. That’s a big consequence for the decision to make and post your video response to Hannah. I hope you all are okay through the hullabaloo, because after it dies down you all will have some healing to do....more
So this young girl believes that if someone angers you, it's OK to publicly humiliate the person ...more

Kids Don't Come with Manuals ... unfortunately

There are tons of user manuals out there, i.e., books. The problem is that children aren't cars, dishwashers, etc. They all vary so much that it's impossible to have 1 manual for each one. I only have 2 children yet they couldn't be more different. Did I raise them the same way? Absolutely not....more

Bullyproof 100% not possible ... maybe 50%

There is no zero tolerance for bullying as it's still going on, worse than ever.  Kids are just getting sneakier, that's all....more

More Unusual Clients: Custody Battles, Same Sex Parenting, Adoption Issues

The majority of my clients are either married or single parents wanting help with such problems as tantrums, bullying, teenage sex/drugs/moodiness, etc.  But, I also help people with such issues as adoption (I'm adopted myself), same sex parenting challenges, etc.  Here are some examples:...more

Parenting like Gandhi?

I've probably written a few articles about leadership but it's worth repeating.So many parents come to me for help with their kids but they soon learn I'm not interested in talking about their kids for very long.  I want to talk about them.  I'm very direct, honest and down-to-earth in my approach.  I don't care if you feel guilty about all the mistakes you're making as we all make mistakes.  Get past it and just move forward in a positive way.  The most positive way is to focus on becoming an effective leader with your children....more

I Won't Tell

I've been writing for The Province (Vancouver) for a few years now, have a weekly parenting column in the Sunday Live It Section.  I'm always looking for questions for the column but know that a lot of parents are nervous as worry about their privacy.  Well, I'll let you in on a little secret ... I re-write all the questions.  I do that for 2 reasons:...more

Apologizing for the Non Apologetic Child: Part 2 of a 3 part series on parenting

Some children find apologizing to be an especially difficult, no I amend that, even an impossible task.  One mother told her argumentative 8 year old daughter, “do not speak to me until you apologize to me”.  Three silent days later the mother walked past her daughter’s room and heard her whisper, once “I am sorry”....more