Maker Faire (Queens): NY Hall of Science

Maker Faire (Queens): NY Hall of Science ...more

Oscar Like Thing Acceptance Speech 2009!

I tend to get painfully jealous of the Academy Award Winners.  I quelled it this year with an acceptance speech for an Oscar Like Thing of my very own. ...more

How I Spent My Valentine's Day. Full Story!!!

Most of the story, anyway.  Took place over 5 hours.  Details must be lost in the wash. I packed a backpack, suitcase, and the 5 foot canvas heart to bring to the space–(the Mission Cultural Center for Latino Arts). ...more

How I Spent my Valentine’s Day Part 1.

I did it!    ...more

A Sheep In The Flock.

  I’ve historically detested these surveys.  I’ve gleefully ranted against them, and now I am doing one.  Too many people I like tagged me on facebook, and I actually enjoyed reading theirs, so I said “well.. Ok.  If ya really, truly want to know.”  I said that aloud to myself whilst looking in the mirror. I wrote 24 things–it took some time, mind you!–and then my internet shut off, and I lost the whole concoction.   ...more

The Therapist Game.

The Therapist Game. Back when I drank, I used to love to play the Therapist Game. I’d get whoever I was talking to at a party to lie down and tell me all of his or her problems, and I’d stroke my chin and say “mm hm, mm hm” a lot and “it sounds like you’re feeling [fill in the blank]“. ...more

Childrens’ Underwear on my Head in the NYC subway.

When I turned 27, I decided that every day of my 27th year, I would perform somewhere. I decided I could do this anywhere for any duration, so long as I had an audience of at least one. ...more

I went on a Silent Date. Part 3.

I chose my favorite response and emailed him asking if he was available.  We met and had our date.  I wrote this entry immediately afterward. In spite of the fact I am a complete Spaz. ...more

Hopefully he won't remember the sweaty part.

http://armchairperformer.com

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New Years’ Nasties.

If you haven’t gathered, I’m not much of a Happy Holidays type. My favorite bad New Year’s story, 2004:  I’d just moved to New York.  I was invited to a party after performing at an open mike. I had one friend there to hang out with, Fred, a 47 year old gay man.  He’s dead now. Anyhow, somebody at an open mike invited me to a party after I performed.  He said it was a costume party and to dress as my alter ego. ...more

One Eyed Man and Richard III

Christmas Day.  I got to the movie theatre before everyone else, balked at the swelling crowd and ran out of the theatre.  I sat on a bench for a few moments, contemplating leaving altogether…  I’m always looking for an exit from any situation. A man with one eye and a swollen, beat up face approached me and said hello.  I said hello and then he got all menacing and did everything but get on top of me, so I ran back into the theatre, my buddies arrived, and that was that. ...more
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