Saying Good-Bye

Image Courtesy: www.freedigitalphotos.netBy Alexandra WilsonWhat could be more devastating than a loss of a loved one?  Whether it’s a breakup, divorce, or death, the experience is stressful and traumatic.  Even more, if you are the one moving on, sometimes that decision is difficult and uncomfortable....more

Yet Again My Ex Makes Me Want to Spork My Eyes Out

Once AGAIN my ex has demonstrated what a selfish asshole he can be through my kids. They had had a loooong day at a fun event called "Touch a Truck." This event included being able to investigate and be inside various vehicles that kids LOVE, such as firetrucks, police trucks, and various construction equipment. Long story short, they were tired at the end of the day and I ALWAYS put them to bed at 8:30. They got settled and we were starting prayers and then......more
I'm with Lynne - my kids call their Dad at bedtime, not the other way around. They call me if ...more

Two Trips for Santa

It took eight hours of divorce mediation before we were asked to sort out Christmas. Having already suffered through the custody part of the agreement earlier in the day, I was too tired to think about holidays by the time it finally came up."What do people do?" I asked. "How do others sort it out?"I learned, that day that there are two ways that Christmas can be worked out.The first option is to split Christmas day into two parts....more

Week one of our separation

Last week was one hell of a week. I have had my extreme ups and downs. I have gone through the panic of "am I making a mistake" to "oh my god I'm not making a mistake, but this sucks." Then there was the massacre in Connecticut, and my heart turned to lead. I did my best last week to not text Bob. I usually start out my days feeling strong and on top of things. I tell myself that I won't text him or respond to his texts. But as the days go on, I get lonely, angry and I can talk myself into saying just "one" thing to him....more

Separation, divorce and dogs

Let me tell you how it feels when your owners that you love to wagging bits decide to argue and separate. Believe it or not, we feel everything and get really confused, nervous and sad.When you experience your parents scream and yell, slam doors and sleep in different rooms…It makes our whole world go crazy....more

The 12 Steps of Getting Over A Break-Up

Imagine that -- working the steps in every area of our lives including a devastating breakup. This is what keeps us sober and clean and sane. And really the whole relationship experience will be for naught unless we learn something from it, yes? Yes. Let's work our way through this. ...more
This is another great 12 step program and comes with community. So ...more

We're Dead and Sleeping With Ghosts

A tear cut down my cheek in silence, like one more golden bead along the side of the glass. It fell on my plate and slid toward the sauce. I looked at it vacantly and I thought about how Rodrigo didn't really need me. I thought about how logical he was. How he didn't require me to emote, how he'd never chastised me for being "remote" or "too logical." I thought about how he knew to leave me alone. Were these bad things? Had we traded in intimacy for a sense safety in one another? ...more
what an incredible piece of writing. how tragic and painful and amazing and full of sorrow... ...more

Holding Down the Tamper on My Breaking Mommy Heart

I woke up early today. Tiptoed downstairs. Rattled scoops of dry food into pet bowls. Slurped yogurt and crunched toast. After that I headed for the calendar, knowing I shouldn't. I couldn't help it though. The days and weeks seem to possess some crazy gravitational power. In my defense, I did white-knuckle-grip the kitchen table but in the end, the calendar won. I counted the squares -- 27. Collapsed onto a kitchen chair. Pressed a cloth handkerchief to my nose. Lately I've made sure there's one in every room. In 27 days you, my oldest daughter, will make like John Denver and leave on a jet plane....more  @JennaHatfield Thanks, girlfriends:)more


  I'm feeling the distance between Rudy and I. It feels very, very wide, with no view of closing the gap. The three thousand plus mile gap. Once or twice, I have had a vision of me falling flat on my face. That my stoic attitude will get the best of me, and crumble, causing me to let go emotionally, and not be able to hold my head up high and deal with our distant situation....more