Choosing Limbo: What Do You Think of Undivorcing?

I wasn't freaked out; only intrigued. I mean, even marriages that end start from a place of love, and it makes sense that a marriage that ends amicably can be sustained with what amounts to a very complicated friendship. Not everyone seeks divorce and the closure it can bring to a union. This woman was free to date other people and pursue her own interests, her children had an easy transition between co-parenting homes, and her ex-husband-yet-still-husband had the aid he needed in order to live. They had a situation they made work. ...more
Jeana You say in each of your four paragraphs that it was a mistake and that it cost you money ...more

Same situation, different interpretations, and an added helping of guilt trips

For the last two months, I have been gently trying to get my ex to agree to changing his access for the (Canadian) Thanksgiving weekend...and today, he finally agreed to do it the way I've been suggesting (insert Happy Dance here!). May I repeat though...I have been working on this for TWO MONTHS...and Canadian Thanksgiving isn't for another two months! ...more

Bad Baby Mama, Good Baby Mama

I’ve had my ridiculous “baby mama drama” moments. I’m not proud. They were more frequent in the first several months of the separation but I think I’ve been a much more controlled and cooperative person the past five months or so. I have a lot of single co-workers and one of my best friends is a single dad....more

People's reactions are all over the spectrum

After my husband and I split, it took me a few weeks to feel stable enough to start reconnecting with friends.  As I told my story, I received many reactions, some supportive and some were astonished, but I usually knew which reaction I was going to receive, depending on who I was speaking with.  Some examples: "But you two are the perfect couple."  - Thank you but I knew how to act to seem like we were. "Can't you two work it out?" - I have the police reports to show why we shouldn't try to work it out. "...more

I was never physically attracted to my ex husband

I finally admitted it.  I was never physically attracted to my ex husband.  I finally said it out loud to a girlfriend of mine recently, then to my counsellor, then to the same girlfriend because I had forgotten I had told her - at least I'm consistent in whom I trust with this kind of information!  I became attracted to my ex husband because of his charm, his wit, his sense of humour and his (I now realize fake) empathy towards us females.  When someone just seems to "get" you, it's amazing how attractive they become.  After the now infamous month of h...more

The "Divorce Diet" is what?

Since becoming separated, I have somehow lost 15lbs.  My food intake has basically consisted of fast food, pizza pockets and chips...not just any kind of chips, but Jalapeno Cheddar Doritos to be specific.  I should have bought stock before I separated...I would have more than made my money back by now.  After all, I go through one of the big bags every other day!  Hello, my name is RedPhoenix, and I'm an emotional eater. My kids' diets haven't changed though.  I continue to feed them what I made for them before their father and I separated.  I just can...more

It's totally not wrong that you don't want to cook in a stuffy, non-airconditioned apartment as ...more

Tipper and Al Gore Separate: Discussing Other People's Marriages

And I think for the majority of Americans, our fascination with the Gore's separation comes from that space of wonder. A couple who had weathered through so many high-pressure storms and came through seemingly unscathed, suddenly separate in a period of calm. ...more

I think you've touched on something here. Rather than trying to discern the reason--when we ...more

I admit it, I mislead you.

My previous blogs were related to finding my purpose in life, and only hinted at a family crisis.  In fact, the reason I stopped writing my blog was because my blog entitled "Consciously thinking about being a poster child for double standards" enraged my "Dear" hubby so much, that I wasn't "allowed" to blog anymore.  The family crisis climaxed at the end of February and, without going into details, the authorities were involved, and unfortunately, continue to be involved.  My "Dear Hubby" wasn't so "Dear", even though I lead you to believe otherwise.  ...more

Great post - so many women have been involved with abusive and controlling men at some point, ...more

King-Sized Bed

NOTE TO READERS: Normally this blog is reserved for transcriptions of my life. However, in the slow, yet determined pursuit of my writing career, sometimes I'm inspired to write outside my box.The below piece, King-Sized Bed is a piece of adult fiction. (I'm not sure if that's a real genre, but the piece contains adults, adult topics, and adult words such as sex & blowjob)....more