Baby Loss: Holding On and Letting Go

"A lifetime ain't no time at all." -Mary Gauthier, "Lifetime""Heaven in Woodwork” by Richard Easterling, 2014“I like to look at my baby’s pictures every day.”...more

Like an Elephant on My Chest: The Enduring Grief of Miscarriage

(Trigger warning: Miscarriage/babyloss) My daughter's been asking to go to the Science Centre for ages. We took the kids once, but didn't get to see everything, and we've been meaning to go back ever since. So, we decided to wrap up our amazing summer with a visit there on the last Friday of the break. It was so fun. Both kids are at great ages for enjoying the wonders of the place. There's so much to do, so many things to learn. We were having a truly wonderful day together. ...more
@MommyPowers-Lynda Thorn Oh my. Big hugs to you, too.more

Finding beauty in death

I cannot imagine the pain of a mother delivering a dead baby. All the dreams, all the plans, all the joy. Gone, just like that. As though it had never happened. I have no idea how I would react. Would I want pictures to remember that child? Or would it hurt more to look at them?...more

Say His Name

I was only surfing the internet when grief came and sat down beside me last weekend.An innocent Google search brought me to the Wikipedia page of an actor that goes by the name, Ben.Bennett. His name is Bennett....more

Everything Changed Today: I'm Pregnant with Your Sibling, Ruby

Dear Ruby, Today I woke up and hugged the blanket Bubba knit for you, as I do every morning. Its softness reminds me of your cheeks, almost silky to the touch. I started today like any other day: I showered, brushed my teeth, washed my face, and picked out what to wear to work. While my routine looked the same, today was different. Today, I am pregnant....more
Tearing up as I read this, so touching, beautiful and inspiring.  Congrats on the wonderful news!more

What If This Is Our Last Baby? Parenting an Only Child After Loss

I didn't expect this to knock me over like they did, the words of this one mama. I started to read her article about why she has decided to be a mother of only one child because I was curious. And then my eyes met this: “I’ve had my daughter . I am so grateful to have my one beautiful daughter. I don’t wish to have any more.” And those words, they were met with tears. Are met with tears now, as I write this....more
What beautiful writing. Thank you for sharing your open and honest heart. I too have lost a ...more

When to Drop the "Dead Baby" Bomb

I've been blogging since a few months after my son died and was born. Along the way I have connected with other bloggers who share my story. There is a special bond between us, we are sisters in grief. Many of us have gone on to have our rainbow babies. Some have stopped blogging, but a few of us have continued. It's been nice to be able to see how other BLM's are dealing with life after our rainbows are born. ...more
I don't know. I suspect that the answer is probably different for each relationship? Is that ...more

Do Books on Grief Make Grief Harder?

I didn't want anyone telling me how to grieve or giving me advice on something so crippling and unforgiving. I didn't want someone telling me it would be okay eventually or that I needed to move on and this was how to do it. I did read two books, but mostly memoirs of those who had babies die before me. I craved that literature, as I wanted to know I wasn't alone. But a psychiatrist's point of view about how to handle the worst thing conceivable? I wanted nothing to do with those words. ...more
Spot on. For the record, I hated Tear Soup, the only book I opened as well, and then shut half ...more

Babies are not supposed to die. End of story.

Ever since that dreadful, beautiful day where I held and lost my son, I felt a strong need to keep his memory alive. This was not an easy task....more

Grief Reflected in Nature

I never really thought about whether or not animals mourn until a few weeks ago when Steve and I were watching a program that has forever touched my heart.Did you know that dolphins grieve? We watched as a dolphin gave birth to her baby and brought it to the surface of the water so it could take its first breath. After a few minutes of her repeatedly nudging it to the surface........more
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