There is something about the phrase "Mommy Wars" that makes me want to gouge out my own eyeballs with a fork, rather than have to read it ever again. It is anathema to every thinking mother I know -- don't we have enough to deal with in life without some manufactured "war" amongst our very ranks?

Being a mom is one of the most confusing job titles some women will ever carry. Of course, once you add just a word or three in front of the word mom, you are dealing with an entirely new set of questions. A mom? Oh? Are you a stay-at-home mom or a working mom? (And, yes, all moms are working moms, but go with that phrase for the time being to mean women who work outside of their home as well as within it.) I have watched over the years as shots are fired from one camp into the other time and again. I have had a great seat for these events? How did I get faboo seats? Simple. I have never been fully immersed in either world for very long.

I have been a stay at home mom for 14 years. Even now when I am asked what I do, I nearly choke out, "I am a freelance writer and author" because I have always been a stay at home mom. No paychecks for me for over a decade. Though the paychecks are now coming in regularly, it still feels strange to think of myself as having a job in addition to motherhood. Let me tell you something right up front. It is hard to make the adjustment. It can be tough to change your perception when you have identified yourself in a particular way for so many years.