Monday Motivation

It’s a dreary and snowy Monday morning here in (typically) sunny Colorado. Monday is hard enough without weather like this tempting me to stay in bed under the warm covers and sleep the day away. It’s work time though and I have shit that needs getting done, sigh. So I’m up with my cup of tea and some music to get me motivated. Today is a fresh start and a new chance to do things my future self will thank me for!...more

Finding Inner Calm

On the outside, I don't show much emotion.  I can smile and be friendly when I want to.  I can confront a problem civilly and show no anger.  I can be pained and tortured inside and not shed a tear.  It may be more a curse than a blessing to have that flat affect.  They might have a diagnosis and prescription medication for that personality.  I don't want it.  I am on a path of inner calm and peace.  Being a mom of tweens, it's not easy to find the time and energy to find the perfect solutions....more

Zen: Not What You Think

For the past year I've been attending a sangha and trying to get my zen on - so to speak. Some people might think that when you sit zazen you're meditating but it's not really that. Meditation carries with it that notion that one is meditating on or about about a certain something. "If I meditate on this dilemma perhaps I'll discover a solution." ...more

“I Have Such Hope for This Species.”

 Some riders are convinced that their horse has a devious plan for world domination- at their expense. Or that their horse is so lazy that any work from him will require a fight. Some riders just think their horses are stupid- and aren’t afraid to say so right out loud.I think these are all sure signs that a horse has given up on his rider....more

The Zen of Washing Dishes

Last summer my barely three year old dishwasher stopped getting the dishes clean. First it was just the dishes on the top rack not coming out clean, so we loaded dishes only on the bottom rack, and ran half loads. After a couple of weeks of that, the dishwasher stopped getting anything clean. I called a highly recommended appliance service repairman and he came by to see what he could do. He listened to my story, turned the dishwasher on, then off, and pronounced the sprayer motor dead. He would charge $200 to install a new one,....more

I'm Zen With That

In truth I'm not, but I'd like to be. Or rather, I like the idea of it. Whatever "it" is. The "zen" part I mean. I assume it means to accept and be at peace with what's around you. I'd like to imagine that's what it means. I could look it up, but I might find I'm disappointed with the actual definition. My definition has, as Stephen Colbert says, a truthiness about it. It may in fact be wrong, but facts are over rated. Besides, I doubt the world's most important endeavours were ever attempted with all the facts in place first....more

My pants are profound.

I just bought new pants.  There’s a pretty blue tag on them that says: Undisturbed calmness of mind is attained by cultivating friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and indifference toward the wicked. I’m afraid I can’t live up to the expectations of my pants. ...more
Denise, the tag says "Blue Star Clothing Company, NYC." First time I've ever owned pants with a ...more

Playing With Fire: When You're the One Who's Tempted

Many of us are unprepared to deny biology's drive after marriage. We see it as a weakness, a gross manifestation of our lack of faith and inner strength. We suffer this almost inevitable shame to eventually -- given enough shame and public penance -- be told it happens to good people and assured we can get through it if we find our path again and work together as a couple. There is no prevention where infidelity is concerned, only damage control. How do marriages survive? ...more
I always hear/read that it's normal to be attracted to other people when you're in love, and the ...more

* Giveaway * Hand Wash Cold by Karen Maezen Miller

While I still feel inadequately ready to write about my retreat last weekend, it’s time.  It’s also time for my February giveaway and I couldn’t think of a more appropriate one than Hand Wash Cold: Care Instructions for an Ordinary Lifeby Karen Maezen Miller.  It’s the book that has recently shifted my perspective, which has helped me embrace the freedom I have in my life.* Giveaway details at bottom of post if you want to skip reading post....more

Zen Beadism

The Question was, and probably still is, Make beads or wait tables? Those are the options I know about. There are countless others I can't see, but for now, I have to work with what I know to be available. One by one we're making little commitments here in Taos. The stinky old couch is officially unsalvageable, so it's on its way out. A new couch says, OK. We'll stay a while. Borrowing a day bed for Lauren's room says, OK....more