Location: Lost Nation, IA, population 500 (no, I’m not making that up--and sadder still, it's where I grew up)

Setting: The Gardner House Bed and Breakfast; a Queen Anne Victorian house owned and lovingly restored by my parents (I donated a tiny bit of sweat equity during the make-over)

Occasion: A luncheon and tour of the house for a group of eleven over-50 folks from out of town (um, not really my crowd, but nice people)

Me: Grossly overpaid prep person, table-setter-upper, floral arranger, kitchen help, server, bus girl, and head bottle washer

First, you need to understand that my parents love this house. It was built by my mom’s relatives and only returned to the family when my parents bought the house several years ago. They worked like dogs to salvage it. One more major project is schedule for late summer/fall this year (and into next year as the case may be); to completely re-side the house, rebuild/restore the wrap-around front porch and rebuild the back porch with new material. It sounds like a painful process to me! (btw, I’ve already become the queen of priming boards for the back porch and more projects are around the corner, I show no mercy with a paint brush)

Second, my parents collect antiques (especially R.S. Prussia porcelain, see pic below) and they love to entertain and talk to people about the antiques and the history of the house. Thus was born the idea of offering luncheons and tours of the house (in addition to offering the B&B services and all the other stuff they do business-wise—yes, my parents are crazy busy people and probably wouldn’t know what to do if they weren’t)

The other important thing to know is that my mom makes all the food for the luncheons from scratch. So really, I’m more than happy to work for leftovers—so yummy!

Anyway, the hoot of the whole thing is that my parents actually dress up in Victorian style clothing. They really are cute! Thank God, they don’t make me dress up in costume! Unfortunately I had to do the old-time costume bit when I worked in a clothing store in Pella during college. I worked during Tulip Time and had to dress as a little Dutch girl. And for all those clueless tourists out there—NO I didn’t dress like that and wear wooden shoes everyday—I’m not even frickin; Dutch! *doh*

Yup, Dad's talkin' with his hands, I sooo do that too!

Mom hates to have her picture taken, so you'll have to guess what her face looks like!

Being at my parents house definitely takes me out of my normal (or usually somewhat strange) world. Stepping back into the Victorian era is surreal, but it's lovely at the same time. One of my major complaints is that the tiny town is the black hole for quality cell reception and for some reason my parents' house sucks the life out of my phone battery. Well, that and I have to share a computer with two other people. It's scary being in the middle of nowhere and disconnected from my electronic life! Trips home always make me appreciate civilization again!